The seventh era of Rustifac began as most do; wood was scarce, KOS was high and most factions held off on recruitment until they could get established. Some players had trouble getting a foothold as roving bandits were seen even in traditionally peaceful areas like Hacker Valley.
We're now a few days in and about ten factions deep. Areas like Small Rad remain dangerous but KOS has started to shift from random nakeds to targeted attacks. With a large influx of new players, some factions like Terminus and KFC have begun to buy goodwill by setting up nakeds with gear and homes. DD was formed as an anti-KFC faction and while they don't yet have significant numbers, they do have the pledged support of GOON, Cartel and likely players killed by KFC post-wipe. It remains to be seen if this alliance will pose a threat to KFC or lose the numbers game as they lack the resources available to larger factions.
Town building seems to be making a welcomed resurgence this era as Gem and the Natives have both broken ground on their respective gambling dens in French Valley. The Cartel is based there as well but thier status is unknown as explosions and gunshots were heard last night but no raids have been reported. There are early reports of Terminus building in the south and KFC outside of Small Rad, yet no land claims have been submitted. TTP is reportedly set up in Hacker South and other large bases have been seen but not yet identified as associated with a particular faction.
Looking forward to the weekend, one can't help but wonder if factions will continue to go after the hearts and minds of players or their loot. Battle lines have begun to be drawn and as factions get established, new members become more valuable than whatever loot they may carry. Will KFC maintain their tenuous hold on Small Rad? Will the entrepreneurs of this era operate in peace as the traders once did? All this and more, happening right now on Rust Factions.

All across the NBA landscape, there's only one thing on people's mind: What are the Charlotte Hornets going to do this offseason??
Kidding, of course. However, the boycott/strike left us with no games today, and perhaps the chance to sneak in the second edition of the OFFSEASON BLUEPRINT series.
Here's a rundown and list of recommendations for the team this offseason.
step one: don't let your (semi) success get to your head
Coming into this season, expectations for the Charlotte Hornets were lower than a limbo bar. Kemba Walker had exited for greener pastures, and the team became a punchline when they ponied up $19M a year for Terry Rozier to replace him. Vegas set their oveunder at 23.5 wins, the lowest in the entire league.
Based on those expectations, coach James Borrego and the team massively overachieved early on in the year. They jumped out of the gates at 13-17, fueled by hot shooting from breakout Devonte' Graham. Eventually, Graham cooled off and the team did as well. Still, they'd end the year at a semi-respectable 23-42, nearly beating that preseason "over" despite a 65-game schedule.
If you're an optimist, you could say that this team isn't too far away from the playoffs. After all, Orlando grabbed the # 8 seed with a 33-40 record. Perhaps if the Hornets made a few tweaks here and there, they could get up to that 35-win range next year and contend for the 8th seed themselves.
Alas, I am no optimist. At least, not when it comes to these Charlotte Hornets. The team got off to a solid start, but all other metrics indicate a team that is B-A-D. Their point differential of -6.7 indicates a team that's even worse than their 23-42 record. In fact, that -6.7 is the 4th worst in the league. Their offense came in at 29th overall (out of 30). Even feel-good stories like Devonte' Graham didn't last forever. His shooting slowed down to the point where he finished the year with a below-average 53.7% true shooting percentage.
By any reasonable assessment, this team is a loooonggg way away from making the playoffs, and even further away from contending in a R1 series. Going into this offseason, the front office and ownership needs to realize that, and adjust their strategy accordingly.
step two: ignore your stars, and shoot for the moon instead
Let's ignore the astronomical problems with that statement and consider the subtext instead.
Perhaps more than any team in the NBA, the Charlotte Hornets need a marquee player. That goes for this roster, but also this franchise's player in history. Charlotte first got an expansion team in 1988 (as the "Hornets") and then again in 2004 (as the "Bobcats" to start.) If we include ALL of that history, dating back 30 seasons, the players with the most total win shares for the franchise are 1) Kemba Walker, 2) Gerald Wallace, and 3) Muggsy Bogues. Those are all good players, but not the type of superstar that'd inspire you to build a statue outside the stadium.
Fortunately, the basketball gods finally smiled upon them and landed them the # 3 pick this year. It's going to be a weak draft, but this will still be the team's best chance to land a superstar since they selected Michael Kidd-Gilchrist (over Bradley Beal) at # 2 back in 2012. Given this opportunity, and given their needs, the Hornets need to aim high here. Shoot for the moon. And in the process, they have to ignore their current roster completely. Top scorers Devonte' Graham and Terry Rozier are OK, but they're not the caliber of player that should force you to adjust your big board at all. The mandate should be simple: best. available. player. Guard, forward, center, it shouldn't matter. We need Michael Jordan to hit a home run here, although we know it's not his specialty.
I don't anticipate that Georgia SG Anthony Edwards will be available, but if he is, then the team should be excited to nab him. Edwards didn't shoot well as a freshman (40% from the field, 29% from three), but he's got the tools to be a potential All-Star. He's long (6'9" wingspan), strong, and hard to guard when he's attacking. I also like the idea of MJ mentoring Edwards and pushing him to get the most out of his talent. If he taps into his potential, we're talking about a Donovan Mitchell-esque player here.
A more polarizing selection that I'd still endorse would be Memphis C James Wiseman. I can understand the criticism against him. He can be passive at times. Perhaps he'll never be an elite scorer or even an All-Star. Still, I like Wiseman for a few reasons. He's 7'1" with a 7'5" wingspan, which should help make him an anchor on defense. He's also a smart kid (based on media interviews). Coach James Borrego came from the Spurs organization, which built around bigs like David Robinson and Tim Duncan originally. Perhaps he'd be more inclined to invest in a big man than other young coaches would. And while I cautioned against factoring in "fit," Wiseman and P.J. Washington would make for great complementary building blocks at the 4 and 5.
Personally, I'm mixed on the 3rd spot (which is where they land, unfortunately.) Draft Express lists PG LaMelo Ball as their # 1 prospect, while The Ringer has French PG Killian Hayes at the top of their board. Both have good size for the position, good passing instincts, and good experience overseas. I don't love the shooting of either one myself and worry about some possible inefficiency, but the Hornets would judge for themselves and select one if they're totally on board. Having two scoring guards like Graham and Rozier shouldn't factor into the equation.
Other names they should consider include PF/C Onyeka Okongwu (USC) and SF/PF Deni Avdija (Israel). I like a few other prospects in the class, but none of them would merit top 3 status. If I ran Charlotte, I wouldn't try to get cute about trade-ups or trade-downs either. The lottery was generous to you, so let's not look a gift horse in the mouth.
step three: don't be a waste of space
The Charlotte Hornets already have $79M committed in salary for next season, which sounds like "a lot" until you consider it's the third least in the NBA (behind Atlanta and Detroit.) Most teams are already booked up, with twenty different teams already having $100M on the docket.
With a little wiggle room (say $20M or so), the Hornets could potentially be players in free agency. This is not a strong free agency class, and the top names (like Anthony Davis and Brandon Ingram) probably won't come calling.
Still, there are a few young veterans that may be worth pursuing. Sacramento SF Bogdan Bogdanovic is coming off a season where he averaged 18-4-4 per 36 minutes, and may have even more in the tank if he became more of a featured option. At 28 years old, he's probably in his prime already, but his skill set should age fairly well and he should maintain his value over the next 2-3 years. I also like Spurs' C Jakob Poeltl, a 24-year-old big man who's shown well in his limited playing time. He could potentially become a long-term starter on the right team. Sacramento C Harry Giles could also be a good flier.
Outside of a few select picks, the Hornets shouldn't force the issue and throw their money around willy-nilly (like they may have with Terry Rozier.) Someone needs to block DeMar DeRozan's number on Michael Jordan's phone.
That said, they can still use that cap space effectively. If we presume the Hornets aren't making the playoffs anyway, they may as well take a "toxic asset" off another team's hands, a la Sean Marks' Brooklyn Nets. Options could include Gorgui Dieng ($17M), James Johnson ($16M), Thaddeus Young ($13M + $14M), or Al-Farouq Aminu ($9M + $10M). If a team is willing to throw you a bone in terms of draft picks to take them off your hands, you may as well put the cap space to good use.
step four: hold your breath, and prepare to drown
Clearly, we haven't painted a rosy picture here. The team is unlikely to add top talent through free agency or trade, and even that top 3 lottery pick won't be a great player out of the gate. All in all, this is a bottom 10 team that will likely stay in the bottom 10 next year no matter how hard they try and fight it.
So if you're already sinking... why not drown completely? Yes, friends, we're talking about a full blown tank.
If the Hornets see the writing on the wall early next year, they need to commit fully and aggressively to a tank in 2020-21. I wouldn't normally recommend that tactic in today's day and age given the new flattened lottery odds, but this may be a "perfect storm" of events. The top 3 is ripe for the picking. Golden State won't be 15-50 next year. Minnesota (19-45) and Atlanta (20-47) should be better as well. The biggest threats would be Detroit (20-46) and the N.Y. Knicks (21-45), but both have older coaches that may not be keen on throwing a year of their coaching lives out the window.
Tanking makes logical sense for Charlotte, but they need some buy-in from the organization first. We'd have to convince Michael Jordan and the ownership group that it's in the team's long-term interest. They seem committed to "compete," but squeaking out a bunch of 30-win seasons over the next few years may be a great way to lose the entire franchise to relocation. Taking a short-term fall could land a star, and lead to a brighter future down the road.
We'd also need the ownership to give the greenlight to the front office and coaching staff as well. James Borrego will be entering Year 3 with the team, and will be nervous about his job security. Mitch Kupchak will be as well in the front office. For them to embrace a tank, they'd need some assurance that they're in this for the long haul. Personally, I like Borrego as a coach, so I'd try my best to commit to him and this long-term plan.
If the team can get on the same page and follow through, then there may be gold at the end of the rainbow. Next year's class appears (at the moment, anyway) to be a strong group, highlighted by playmaking wing Cade Cunningham (heading to Oklahoma State) and scoring guard Jalen Green (heading to the G-League.) PF Evan Mobley (USC), SF Jalen Johnson (Duke), and SF Ziaire Williaims (Stanford) also have the potential to join the # 1 pick conversation in time. And while those flattened odds make it difficult to ensure the # 1 pick, grabbing the # 1 spot means that you can only drop as low as # 5. That 5th pick next year may be even better than the # 3 this season.
other offseason blueprints
ATL, BKN, BOS, CHI, CLE, DAL, DEN, DET, HOU, IND, GS, LAC, LAL, MEM, MIA, MIL, MIN, NO, NYK, OKC, ORL, PHI, PHX, POR, SA, SAC, TOR, UTA, WAS

Greetings! Glushkin here, and before my inevitable corona death, I would like to tell you about the fate that befell The Foggy Albion in the world of LaHL, as well as take a closer look at one of the major factions, fighting for the future of the British Isles. Without further ado, let us begin. Great Britain in The World of National-Bolshevism
The fall of the United States of America in the beginning of the 21st century shocked the entirety of the western civilization. The accepted status-quo collapsed like a house of playing cards, which led to Great Britain becoming the last major bastion of atlantist culture on the world stage. The desperate attempts to hold NATO together in the face of a new Eurasian threat ended up bearing no fruit. The history of western european unity ultimately ended after The Eurasian State and Federal Republic of Germany signed the “Friendship and Mutual Cooperation” treaty. This alliance put an end to the seemingly achievable dream of a pan-european identity.
The treaty became a prerequisite to the creation of an entirely new geopolitical system in the Old World, based on the cooperation of two great telluric civilizations. The new germano-eurasian block promptly began to gradually isolate Great Britain from the rest of the world, on the basis of it being the main source of atlantist plague. The last British hope for an alliance in the form of French Republic eventually also joined the treaty.
Great Britain stood completely alone.
The next several years can be described as a long and agonizing death of Old Britain The severe sanctions by the Treaty countries have taken their toll. An economic recession occured, followed by widespread scarcity of consumer goods and rampant crime. The voices of various political radicals grew louder both in the city streets as well as in the British parliament. Attempts by the Labour Party to create a self-sufficient economy failed spectacularly, due to lack of time and resources, corruption within the party and refusal of its leaders to take extreme measures, wishing to retain the support of their electorate.
Such state of affairs ignites mass discontent among the british populace. London, the hub of political radicalism in the country, becomes the center of the aforementioned unrest. The City is disturbed by rallies and protests on a daily basis. Dozens of “Autonomous Zones” appear and vanish in the city throughout the years. Some of them are eliminated by force.
2017
https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/GxVu92jpDErGeRCgdJG5xyvJgupVUFzl6-olG6TxX5YdBAAucW29BRRjOceU7BZHVi3694Ny2z7xpZT1EPAeGi44HNWDa5ml6zJ1bUBKhxqdPFB_r8sfCWcpbaCsZxHyQyF5B-8_
In 2017, the Scottish Parliament holds a successful referendum on secession from the United Kingdom. At the same time, London is engulfed by one of the biggest spontaneous rallies in recent years. Protesters, unsatisfied with the weakness shown by the government in face of external and internal threats as well as economic recession and the continuing disintegration of the Kingdom, rise up in the streets. Demonstrators take over administrative buildings, police stations and major transport hubs of the capital. Numerous leaders of the uprising declare London an independent zone under the control of a new, local government. Following this, the streets of the capital are plunged into complete chaos. A certain part of the army sides with the protestors, the capital is overrun by marauders.
Supporters of the old regime attempt to evacuate the labour government and the royal family from the blazing city, However, the chaos of the uprising, the evacuation team is attacked by unknown individuals in the chaos of the uprising. The Prime Minister is killed, queen Elizabeth II is missing in action. Her fate remains unknown to the present day. What remains of the british government escapes to Germany, in exchange for any future reparations, after the order has been restored to the country.
Taking advantage of the paralysis of the central government, the increasingly popular "Autonomist" movement in Wales, declares the independence of the republic.
The supporters of the old government fail to keep Ulster from leaving the United Kingdom. After the beginning of the first religious and ethnic conflicts, Ireland occupies north with the official permission from Eurasia and most of the european countries, taking the region under “temporary care”.
Protests, uprisings and rallies continue to spread throughout Great Britain. The northern and central parts of the Kingdom fall under the control of various self-serving military men and local governors. All of them declare the desire to “restore order in the region”. Only the southern part of Britain temporarily remains stable in the chaos of the fallen country. The technically legal authority of the new head of the Windsor dynasty - prince Charles (now known as George VII) becomes a beacon of hope for many britons in these troubling times.
https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/XGm7JHa2BTnb5mTN3NsbfV92zBMldL1LC9t9LTVOmee0dyiMPg2cRIl4Rss_HPpI4dw6XiXXgxm_QTGDyRFjoWCuBt7JwU-ly4H6VmZ5gHBWDXKgJvEgU3UXScFBEjxVzXk5qgqc
2018
Within the next year (thanks in large part to the generous investments of Eurasia), the northern part of the country unites under the leadership of George Galloway - a political activist, who supports the main doctrines of the eurasian world order and advocates for a policy directed at the eradication of anglo-saxon political institutions and traditions and their subsequent replacement by the continental order.
https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/GjwL8z8oE93dVlqqi3PqOhvXTuQPYFHPudl9uu864jw8mnkTpOmniKadSXlxme0yerh5vPbwmQheE3gVdRxu-eTLAfqEcuX-T9iNfnnE3ng9U6KJc8pm-vErnQ8-5LVKYX7yl-f6
A few months later, at the request of the British government in exile a contingent of german military lands on the isles and establishes a foothold in Eastern England. In spite of initial success in eliminating pockets of resistance amongst the central counties of the country, the limited numbers of Bundeswehr troops weren’t able to completely defeat the poorly trained but numerous Galloway supporters. Soon enough, the initial success turned into a complete disaster after the german attempt to liberate the city of London. After being bogged down in urban warfare amongst the streets of the megapolis, Bundeswehr suffered severe casualties and was forced to retreat, leaving a sizable part of Germany’s elite units on the battlefield.
This defeat forced the German government to rearrange its strategy in the region. The occupied territories were reformed into the "Department of Eastern England", where an interim military government was formed. Its objective was to reconstruct the controlled territories and prepare the further expansion of the occupation zone. Due to unprecedented losses among military personnel, a decision was made to partially replenish continget’s manpower with english and german volunteers.
https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/wgL6WmaVpa0nvmoXVhVh2X0yEmlxV43s-3aq3QO9IWAflvG0Z1tkmeXZLxTq-RHhGdv2PUIo5sdANGTAnYhOZclE_pDXlkwTBUyG20xjLckOVbfQixg3eZmCiW3ykNVBRpZrRhRp
At the same time, George VII's failed attempts to regain control of the central counties and start the true liberation of Britain from traitors and various invaders have given the new king a negative image of a "soft" and "passive" leader. According to some of his subjects, His Majesty simply was not competent enough to save the country in such a difficult situation. This, in turn, seriously affected the monarch's psychological state. The King began withdrawing into himself, losing interest in and disregarding important state affairs. The final blow, which plunged George VII into complete depression and his loyalists into despair, was delivered by the King's own son, Prince Harry, now known as King Henry IX. The latter, disappointed in his father's leadership, gathered an impressive group of supporters from various populists, remnants of the Old Government and ambitious generals dissatisfied with George's leadership. Initially, the young aspirant planned a quick operation to liberate London, thus not only gaining control of the capital, but also asserting his own legitimacy as King of the United Kingdom. Henry hoped that his father would then willingly abdicate the throne and the conflict would be resolved peacefully. As it was in the case of the German operation six months ago, the attempt to swiftly occupy London resulted in a complete failure. With no intentions of waging war against his own father, Henry IX in turn focuses on the internal politics of his "state", only occasionally raiding the borders of London. By early 2019, what once was the main bloc, aimed at the restoration of the United Kingdom, has been shattered in two.
https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/yyfctNX9pk-aB3j5rZvZKYnJIXrfdfcY7-fGTQuEloc4_3h9r2xjQSIgV6AWJFFuw-XH5hJo5UvzgIOmiFm1gRNJcNrnFmJNUV4nszEEHC_1jSMUx6UMY09v5KL2KTyz_ibyXH4I
2019 By the beginning of 2019, the central region of England, formerly a battlefield between Royalist, Republican and local government forces, had been united under the leadership of charismatic and mysterious Douglas Pierce, the leader of a so-called Black Army of Britain. He and his supporters proclaim the liberation of England from invaders, weak monarchs and perverts who defiled the purity and holiness of the homeland, as their main goal. The Black Army mostly consists of urban militias, deserters, criminals looking for redemption, pagans and political radicals - all united in the unconditional devotion to their leader, who created an image of Immaculate Saviour for himself. The Folcists may lack weapons and supplies, but their training, experience and fanaticism makes up for it. Their troops can rightfully be called the most combat-ready throughout the entirety of the Isles. The Black Army isn’t looking for awards or material wealth. It doesn't fight for weak kings or false leaders. It doesn't need colourful banners of southern royalists (that’s why it’s called a “Black Army”). The only goal Folcists have in mind is the salvation of their dying motherland.
https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/SNMna_44BoUKpcKj6zbQcxSEHO-oV5h5vIzmv0A-wnl52cAG7OlMS5m3LxDqgsNFUoqQnIWzpi2vHlS01k6vAFTBSHGjdz-lUf1z-DIzvav4hppfWcJBlFfk0ZLU59CFeSx6rTL4
2019
The last significant events in the chronicles of the British Civil War occurred in late 2019. Jacob Rees-Mogg, an old ally of George VII, leads an uprising of the "High Tories" in the county of Kent. Originally planned as a bloodless coup against the passive king, Rees-Mogg's plan was thwarted by the unwillingness of Roger Scroton, one of the king's main associates, to participate in thе "ludicrous gamble”. In the end, the rebellious conservatives only managed to occupy a small part of western England. Their manpower is limited and their resources are scarce. Any attempts to persuade George VII to surrender, by the leader of the High Tories have since failed. Now, Rees-Mogg will have to make a monumental effort if he wishes to unite England under the authority of a conservative monarchy and elect a new king, which will be able to adequately represent Great Britain on the world stage. At the same time, a surprise turn of events occurs in the anarchic system of the London Autonomous Zone. The power in the capital passes into the hands of Max Mosley, the leader of the most influential “gang” in London. Spouting nationalist slogans about the weakness of the Windsors and their supporters, Mosley proclaims that the time to completely liberate Great Britain from the old-fashioned monarchy and despicable invaders has finally come. Rumor has it that Mosley's success can be attributed to the actions of the odious and disgraced academician Nick Land, who wants to use his patron as a tool, to achieve his dreams of the so-called “Dark Enlightenment”. The new leader of London prepares to finally step outside the borders of the city, into the lawless land of the dying country. However, the most important events of 2019, which affected the entire balance of power in the region, occurred outside of the Islands. The collapse of Eurasia and an internal crisis in Europe and Germany, unshackled the factions of the Civil War from foriegn influence. Deprived of Eurasian support, Republicans prepare for the final battle with the expanding Black Army, which in turn is in process of gathering its forces on the border of Galloway supporters. The Department of Eastern England, which in the last years has transformed into a den of corruption, banditry and political radicalism, will soon leave the German sphere of influence, while Max Mosley's stormtroopers, encouraged by the weakening of their opponents, are preparing to take their country back. We shouldn’t also forget about the Southern part of the country, split between George VII and his former allies, each faction strifing to achieve dominance in the region. At the same time, various republics that have succeeded from Britain continue to manifest their own destiny. Wales and Scotland are building their strength and gathering armies. There are rumors about a possible alliance between them.
The time for action has come. England shall be saved or will perish in the bloodshed of the coming conflict. This is the only way.
https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/wgvRqRpgK6HU9c20MEMb0y0sZ7DlJUj-74jM45BkuhEWIE6m0q2B2_rOvVLQi6CocHM2epd1-2m-PJa_tL2HtCE5HCAK_BeX8MeiMX7GhCYpZiHGuVGwRFvJyfsrbRAcI88b75Qj
“The Fisher King”
However, today we will only talk about one faction out of the ones we have listed. And it doesn’t even have anything to do with them lacking any sufficient content! They actually have that! Aside from focus icons, that is. Even the great King George VII lacks a lot of them as of right now. There was a suggestion to replace “question mark” icons with Mordred from the “Fate” franchise, but the character was too wide for the frame and also was absorbing the text, and frankly I was too lazy to properly change it. However, let's get back to the topic. The faction we are going to look at in this diary calls itself "Royalists" and is located in Southeast England and Cornwall.
https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/IYn_AiriNXucXAdiKio7uLHZoMJpLbIvBs5kLxHiNaHdCkB54wmMVNKwzqu9i8ykRHnhnZSynCl0Xu9Px4fpDdKKfXH_u_ewCbfvKBN2qkToRl-cl7ROshCW4RkJ_9yajIAnFS3h
(Old screenshot, map has been changed)
The leader of this movement, as it was already mentioned, is George VII, aka Prince Charles and the lawful head of the Windsor dynasty.
https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/Q7eyPrYcGidxvC0iCbCPWtRUCDm8Wla4JMkxjPYQfmD_tPR647brnoLCX4827v3A6ZkbsbMikRLYmJl2xdsU68SIF_Gv4f4HvKxL-IKj67COPCbEAfNrgGBAu96qpx8arsEgMBc6
However, not all of his subjects share this opinion. As it was mentioned in the “lore section”, the king was suffering from a severe depression, due to various military setbacks, Prince Harry's betrayal and the generally sorry state of his country. A few weeks before the beginning of 2020, the king suddenly disappeared. The monarch's court assured the people that the ruler would soon return, and his disappearance was caused by an extremely important "business trip", he had to go on. Despite official government statements, many immediately started speculating that the king had simply abandoned his country, just as the previous government did at the beginning of the country's collapse. However, after only a few weeks, George VII did actually return. The monarch has changed. No one can say exactly what happened to the head of the Windsor House on this trip, but the king returned to England as a “new man”. He acted more decisive, began to speak more confidently and once again has started attending various political meetings that he had been missing in the past few years. George is still far from regaining his former legitimacy in the eyes of the British people, but the process has begun indeed. The King of Great Britain has truly returned. George's focus tree is divided into four main parts - military branch, civilian branch, diplomatic branch and the 'legitimacy branch'. In order to understand the concepts that will form the basis of these branches, it is necessary to consider several mechanics associated with this country. The first one, the so-called legitimacy mechanic, shows the level of support George receives from the people.
https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/v7wNQNL4p92eK0h_kIbhE7WauQIWN8etiwVh7vh_U6zpKmOzX1tqCsP_EjLHqFOU3u2jjwHS_mqpUOo5xwh-_w6qXtv7HxkS2fGExFjGo41d4tHIHOu47osZ4217itmrkAjE_oXc
High legitimacy allows for various political decisions, such as the invasion of different hostile factions, as well as certain "non-standard" reforms (this will be discussed later). If the legitimacy of the king drops too low, something very unpleasant will happen. Legitimacy is reduced if the Royalists suffer heavy casualties in one of the local wars, if one of the “non-standard” reforms is adopted with an insufficient legitimacy level,or due to certain events that happen during the playthrough.. Increasing the legitimacy can be achieved by defeating various opponents in wars, by carrying out specific actions in the "legitimacy branch", as well as by obtaining new "knights" at the king’s Round Table. Let's talk about the last one first.
https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/6Y1OQ-dtKBIvB1EuWQ2RYsvjYmIAN4znS_23VTsBXOlc0BVh0nFQJpeRjKYGTJVd4pwoAA432-sK8EgUV39yiSkuOC-mB9p5ov875Syo870GF4xxdc4GQD59r__n4dlfbNzi3Mwu
This element of the new GUI has already been shown in one of the teasers (not for you westerners, haha) and represents the "unique mechanic" of the Royalists. The "Round Table" of George VII is a collection of friends, advisers and simply noble and brave (not necessarily) men (also not necessarily) who assist the king in his battle for control over Britain. Initially, you can see only George on the table as well as the treacherous shadow of Prince Harry, which still hangs a heavy burden on the monarch’s heart. You can get new knights through random events and special focuses. The "Knights" themselves give the Royalist certain bonuses, affect the "plot" of the gameplay, and, depending on the chosen people, slightly change the "ending" of your playthrough. It should be noted that each of the twelve positions on the table can be taken by several people, so each George playthrough would be slightly different. It is also worth talking about the aforementioned "legitimacy tree". Here, you can hire new knights for the table, (it is worth noting that the knights don’t necessarily have to be pure-blooded Anglo-Saxons.You can find people of various nationalities among them, ranging from Americans and Arabs to Russians and Germans), test George resolve to be a worthy king, bolster the morale of his people with heroic speeches and courageous acts, and also send one of the knights on very "special" task.
https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/ayUsUUX2aP6nL_Ua9Kf6mJXcZvEooUHlDa7hxsqxx3iJYPyGgA3AUmPJKqQlXNPoygim2FHBjvzkAvv-7kXxuViWSfYfrH3-xdRjGPZfp_luC1BwT_LIqDBbiqgZILvdWjUDAbl-
Here it a good place to talk about the very "non-standard" reforms and views of the new British King, which affect most of his Focus Tree branches. The policy of George VII is aimed at transforming Great Britain into a pastoral state, devoid of the vices of modern society and built on the ancient traditions of the English people. According to the King, this is the only way his subjects can find true happiness in this chaotic and terrible world. It should be noted that George's ideas should not be confused with those of anarcho-primitivism or neo-feudalism. The king's ideology is much closer to neo-Medievalism, i.e. the revival of high morals, traditions and customs often found in the Middle Ages. Cultural decadence is not a consequence of the industrial society in itself, but on the contrary, its shortcomings are rooted in our recent moral downfall. The royalist “civilian economy” tree consists of several main branches - the struggle against the manifestations of industrial society, the revival of the English spirit, the creation of conditions for the creation of the "pastoral society", as well as global reform of the entire social order. In the "industrial" branch, Georg will start with planning out his country’s industrial developments to achieve maximum efficiency at this particular moment which would be followed by the gradual reduction of the industrial base of Britain, after the end of the civil war. The next focuses will concentrate on gradual de-urbanization, restoration of agricultural areas and the natural environment, as well as a focus on clean energy.
https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/n9v7YHmdYRG32IxpceopTklpH-dX5CK7BWIH23NKRuTYjYRQpXKl7AlA09UccZ67fKgP_c4wxjG7EE641rol9QlhE2ppulrMfYrpAWqB4KgXFTDKv5GrQkYLupEdmmWTvEuvW1lO
The revival of the English spirit implies the recreation of an English society that combines traditional English culture with a romantic view of the honor and dignity inherent to each resident of the United Kingdom. Despite this, George will also be able to preserve certain innovations of the modern social order. Perhaps, some traditions are fated to remain in the past.
https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/D2IJWAy4GliRyyg6lqGB122gqAPytXeSLkgWntf2Y_ydPjdperkLKeaSDSdYGwm7gFHbpgp57dCMeqhB8j9niVhdCfFQGK63yZJ0zL2Nq920HwmkRSVB9QQFEpXaskt3YXDZrgfK
The “Pastoral Society” branch implies a gradual return to subsistence economy, in order to consolidate local economic ties in various regions, as well as presentation of subsidies and benefits for families and citizens who are willing to voluntarily leave the cities to resettle the rural areas.
https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/Q-B78pQORyl048436VZ5qPEGM3dhf93mjFsOE2lnQI_PSuKKBIZQwm8HOZI8f5hdhVeQ-I5eGb5FkwmSqLz7YvZCM6UziMC0dx3cdc_5_BfXzlDKGDUf51fIV7yDHVqjaKbx0mRe
The last part of this branch is a choice between a complete cultural reconstruction of British society, with involves the liquidation of harmful modern pop culture and the restoration of Old English language, or a syncretic symbiosis of modern and traditional english culture,with an aim of creating a postmodernist neo-traditionalist cultural system, where English culture and traditions are viewed and deconstructed through the lenses of the 21 century.
https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/C1XYpUQIiGCVVK_sVo8XBFW9FacKbKopa613sSrW0d_y42XX34xtdnIZrMDx3v98rTMQBpJa0O2slTLf0sNnpYG77RHGr03iTDSWQy4NYp1jqgr1M04Dtn1XIGXDtKGV8qlXy3JO
The next tree, we are going to focus on is the military one.. George's philosophy in this direction is based on the creation of elite and well-armed detachments, without using any experimental or futuristic weapons. The left part of the tree is responsible for bonuses for different armored vehicles. The central part gives bonuses for infantry and the doctrine. The right one upgrades your air fleet.. In addition to standard bonuses, George will also be able to create a system “Knightly Orders” for tank drivers and pilots, who would be honoured and respected by the British society. To reduce the impact of the military-industrial complex on the king’s "pastoral society" the monarch will create specialized "Weapon Guilds" - isolated clusters, responsible for creating modern weapons and keeping the sacred knowledge of manufacturing tanks and planes a state secret. The last focus of the Tree - "A Ring Of Steel" - is the unification and preservation of the remaining British fleet, that would forever keep the Isles safe from any possible continental invasion.
https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/onPt4dM3asbXpmcLMNQcXOc0pC2LVNfGss8Po89gU_fcEiOI8KFpBKl-4Rom5t0oZJFi5K4wZVGS58vHp8w7T6a2CRAQZ51hF5716fQRrovvfE_i9NzkA3GtmUUWecNH0PclUxr6
And last but not least, the diplomacy and civil war tree. The first and most important action that George will have to do - is to find enough strength to fight against Prince Harry's army and defeat him. In case of a victory, the king will have to decide the fate of the captured traitor.
https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/kaoeNnwpeNkyhZO6wN33G9O3v4ATY12lUjvZUXzJTWGdzeZckvc-K1wEteQRX12vmrFD3zG9jQa88_Kx4x9baIUjAPnRm2gXWt2uaJ3QYL5jNVInO9r19uAKaEcYq57HGk_nBKb8
(The third icon would be resized)
It is also worth noting that you would be able to do something similar as any faction in the civil war, once you conquer one of your rivals and take their leader as a prisoner. In the other factions, this process will be decided through appropriate decisions.
https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/i58wg0vCp6P7gW90otNiiEQcoP1Jra_i-EtwdC62DkmOIfrUp0cAA8axHrpJB0BnUKDG0KO3lux_i5HaZVpkS6VsJyiMYJsWToeaL-V3QWfLUJVYUABr5dNiq3qhwcZbddiG-1lF
However, the case of George and Henry is unique, so there is a separate focus for them. The next tree is dedicated to the elimination of other factions in the civil war.
https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/vmKCgkAl8E3M3nmm6a3c_5wKsVCkZxLrn7w2LFUWjkgvEZfe4UtlJHTZvYZlTNyeI4X4IZ8uNyuetoXVnqm5idafDGpmem5reBbmT1ZVmM5pwmfvgE8f0O9XBL3Y4CpmVpKfceVS
The only faction Charles can theoretically achieve diplomatic success is the Black Army of Douglas Pierce. The latter is a noble and courageous man who bravely fought against German invaders and Eurasian Anglophobes. He is worthy of taking a place at the king’s “Round Table” The only present issue lies in the fact, thatPierce is an occultist and has very unusual ideological preferences. If George and his subjects can convince Douglas on several matters, the Royalists will gain a formidable ally in the central part of Britain.
https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/gZT0I3vsrWExPTVj2txdf9qVlnyEakN82i048vCAVz8aOE7Bm_Ff-mKUn0YsoKZhykVDgcRQ5E5BLCZ5YW3tirCV5atDYojs6AC7FVAETYb06jl54W1U2QxtEfQ_5_LdRtlD-Yyc
The last mutually exclusive focuses are responsible for George's interactions with the separatist regions of Scotland and Wales. The ruler will have to decide whether to return the breakaway regions by force, try to influence them diplomatically or grant the republics their independence officially.
https://lh5.googleusercontent.com/UgsW9TGlw5_yaaabC2SbbuWOh0Na7Jncla8zO-Sl3l_UxJpdqEsIivlNzwtfSjX0nq5HUGTQ9BDBIXVHJ0BaS2OqbvXEGN0bny5Fn--Ceeh9hO-v-IlVN8CcdvqOiXuAmOeNtyR5
However, this is not all. Royalists also have several hidden focus branches that will be opened as the game progresses. They, in turn, will answer the various important questions, such as, what was the king's "business trip" about?, and what influenced the new monarch of the United Kingdom so much during the few weeks he was absent from the country? And that's it for today, See ya!

Throwaway. Also, if you believe in Qanon conspiracies, participate in MLMs, or are an anti-vaxxer, this is probably not the post for you!
Before I (29F) moved in with my current roommate, L (32F), we previously knew each other from my college days. We were Facebook friends, but nothing more. Two years ago we ended up becoming roommates in our current city. We lived together for a month (Sept 2018) until she started her new job in another state. She was not happy that she had to leave but she was hoping to quickly transfer back to our city, so she subleased her room to an acquaintance of hers, K. I could write a whole other post on K, but long story short she was a heavy drug user and presented a multitude of problems to both myself and L. We asked K to leave the apartment in early 2019 and I took on the responsibility of finding someone I could cohabitate with since L blew that one.
I went through two other temporary roommates while L was gone - no issues with them. Sweet, intelligent girls who worked hard and tended to be on the quieter side, but when we did converse it was always pleasant.
L was furloughed from her job due to Covid and she did not want to continue staying in her "base" city, so she decided to come back to our apartment Sept 2020. I am also laid off from my job because of Covid as well, so we are home together most of the time.
L started this "new business venture" during this time - aka she joined haircare MLM. I am against MLMs in general, but this one especially because of their hormone-disrupting products and the way they attempt to take advantage of cancer patients losing hair from chemo treatments (something my father went through, passed away from (Dec 2018), and L is aware of). I refuse to buy into any of it because I've gone through enough sh*t with my hormones being out of whack, so it's a gamble I'm not about to take. It's absolutely PAINFUL to listen to L try to describe the sCiEnCe behind the products they shill (it's all VERY incorrect). The "calls" that L is on almost every day of the week are literal brainwashing sessions led by some of the densest women I've ever heard speak - and L GUSHES over them. L also loves to do "experiments" where she lights store-bought dry shampoo on fire IN OUR APARTMENT to prove their products are better for you. Now she wants to use my toaster to show how great their heat protectant product is...on bread.
I have never once told L I didn't believe in her company or products. I (in my humble opinion) do not show much interest, however, L interprets it as not being mentally "present." L talks to me about her job every. Single. F*cking. Day. Blasting those calls and other brainwashing videos from her room (are you deaf???). L has tried to prey on 2 of my friends to join her in this "business", but I advised them against it. L tries to invite me to their events - no thanks. She reminds me every so often that I can work "with" her. She thinks my aunt should sell the products in her hair studio. And when L is venting or looking for solutions to her problems such as, "How do I make more money? How do I get more people interested?", I do attempt to offer genuine help. When I asked L about sales and the numbers she wanted to reach, she immediately became defensive and condescending ("ThE iNfOrMaTiOn Is OuT tHeRe"). L poorly attempts to explain how it isn't a pyramid scheme. L fully believes manifestation is the key to her success. I'm sorry, I have a business degree from a renowned university. My family is comprised of mostly business owners. You're not fooling anyone here.
I don't mean to be keeping score of all the stupid stuff she does, but some things are starting to worry me, and quite frankly I don't feel like playing mommy or doing damage control anymore. Here are just a few incidents that stick out to me:

• Wanted to install a new chandelier. When I asked if she needed me to turn the circuit breaker off, she said no. She ended up not installing the chandelier, but if she tried, she'd probably be a french fry right now.
• Left the gas running on the stove (knob was turned all the way on) for 3-4 hours at night with all of the windows closed - no flame.
• Left for a weekend trip and didn't plug in her cat's automatic feeder after she unplugged it for her ring light. Enough said. I caught it and plugged it in.
• Complains about Covid, wearing masks, and spreads misinformation about it - even after my uncle's father passed from it last month. Very considerate.
• I don't think L knows what Qanon is, but has mentioned multiple parts of it - adrenochrome, believes B*den killed his son (but L voted for him?!?!?!?!). When I ask what she's talking about, she puts on this condescending "oh you poor unfortunate soul" act.

At this point, L is just generally annoying to me - expects all the attention to be on her when she comes into the room, is manipulative, talks over my TV shows (and adds in her two cents even though she has NO context of what's going on), and is pretty blind to social queues. It's like living with a 5-year-old. I don't even want to introduce her to a neighbor of ours who I recently became friendly with because he's planning on getting a hair transplant and I don't want to subject him to her crap.
L did tell me about two instances where her former roommates became frustrated with her or iced her out...what a shocker. L has also shown through her Instagram stories that she can be spiteful towards said roommates. L wants to be my friend, but I'm done forcing myself to be hers. I wouldn't voluntarily be friends with anyone that believes in/promotes the things L does. We've had a few fun times together, but maintaining a relationship with L isn't worth my sanity. I feel bad because I have emotionally confided in her before, and I don't want to seem like I'm using her for that.
I appreciate anyone who suffered through reading this and would love advice on how to handle this situation, as my lease isn't up until September of next year and it isn't feasible for me to move right now. I guess I'm looking for a path of least resistance, as I know if/when I drop the whole "It's not you, it's me" line, she will undoubtedly ask why. Also, I've previously scoured antiMLM but I'm not looking for L to get a new job or to help her see the light. She can dig herself out of that hole on her own.
TL;DR - My misled, absent-minded, MLM-schilling roommate is getting on my last nerve and I don't want to be her friend.

Widely regarded as one of the greatest of New Zealand's films (and rightly so, I think), this is a comic romp set in post WWII rural New Zealand. It's directed by Ian Mune, whose name should ring a bell to anyone who knows the NZ film scene.
Wes and Cryil (Peter Bland and Philip Gordon) are a pair of chancers trying to make money on a scam called "Past Posting" where a bet is placed on a horse race that has already run. This worked in 1949 when few races were broadcast. One watches the race live and phones the pub where his accomplice is and relays a coded message, who places a big bet with the resident bookmaker (I think every pub had one in those days). The problem is that it needs a third accomplice to make it realistic due to the timing of the phone calls. The opening scene is one such bookie seeing through it and Wes having to make a quick getaway.
They head to the coastal Taranaki town of Tainuia (based on Hawera) where they hook up with Don Jackson, who is stuck in a dead-end car sales job and willing to get some excitement into his life.
Their scam is successful - for a time. Jackson makes two profitable bets but the bookie (Norm Cray) is suspect and forces him to blind bet on the third race - which he also wins through blind luck.
There are other plots just as important, but the big new character is The Tainuia Kid, played by the late Billy T. James. He's Maori but affects a Spanish accent (must confess that when I read the book I thought it was French). In the book I didn't think this character worked at all, but in the film he is key. The other plot is the town's big crim who has someone burn down a snooker hall as he's in up to his neck. The problem is the supposedly empty building wasn't and an innocent man dies in the fire.
The other plot concerns an illegal gambling den in a wool-shed, where Crown and Anchor is the game played. The trio retire there to parlay their winnings into even more. This joint is run by Sel Bishop, the man who had the billiard hall burned down. And Norm Cray suspects foul play in the winning bets. It doesn't go well on the table and they lose most all they won on the gee-gees. Wes's last big bet comes in (three anchors) but the rozzers raid the joint and he doesn't get the winnings. Even worse, Sel sets Norm Cray onto a helpless Wes.
In one my favourite scenes, the Crown and Anchor table flips over to become the wool classing table that was its original usage.
In the morning, Wes meets "The Tainuia Kid" who is no fan of Sel. The last third of the film is Wes trying to get revenge on Sel. This is my least favourite part of both book and film as the jokey tone turns serious.
It's based on the classic book of the same name by Ronald Hugh Morrieson, and it is well worth seeking out. It is of its time with outdated language and mores but I don't care about that. You can't and shouldn't rewrite history. He lived in Hawera his whole life. This adaptation is more comic than the book but quite close to the meaning. The actors playing Wes and Cyril are older than I imagined the characters from the book, but that might just be me. And there's little room in the film for Don's dad, a veteran of Gallipoli who lost a leg there and is finding his old digger mates are dying off and he's turning old and sour, though he's trying hard not to. He was my favourite character in the book, but I can see how he's not suitable for a big part in what is essentially a comic adaptation.
A final mention to the wonderful rural New Zealand locations that were shot. I love the small towns and landscapes from back then.

Widely regarded as one of the greatest of New Zealand's films (and rightly so, I think), this is a comic romp set in post WWII rural New Zealand. It's directed by Ian Mune, whose name should ring a bell to anyone who knows the NZ film scene.
Wes and Cryil (Peter Bland and Philip Gordon) are a pair of chancers trying to make money on a scam called "Past Posting" where a bet is placed on a horse race that has already run. This worked in 1949 when few races were broadcast. One watches the race live and phones the pub where his accomplice is and relays a coded message, who places a big bet with the resident bookmaker (I think every pub had one in those days). The problem is that it needs a third accomplice to make it realistic due to the timing of the phone calls. The opening scene is one such bookie seeing through it and Wes having to make a quick getaway.
They head to the coastal Taranaki town of Tainuia (based on Hawera) where they hook up with Don Jackson, who is stuck in a dead-end car sales job and willing to get some excitement into his life.
Their scam is successful - for a time. Jackson makes two profitable bets but the bookie (Norm Cray) suspects a scam and forces him to blind bet on the third race - which he also wins through pure luck.
There are other plots just as important, but the big new character is The Tainuia Kid, played by the late Billy T. James. He's Maori but affects a Spanish accent (must confess that when I read the book I thought it was French). In the book I didn't think this character worked at all, but in the film he is key. The other plot is town's big crim who has someone burn down a snooker hall as he's in up to his neck. The problem is the supposedly empty building wasn't and an innocent man dies in the fire.
The other plot concerns an illegal gambling den in a wool-shed, where Crown and Anchor is the game played. The trio retire there to parlay their winnings into even more. This joint is run by Sel Bishop, the man who had the snooker hall burned down. And Norm Cray suspects foul play in the winning bets. It doesn't go well on the table and they lose most all they won on the gee-gees. Wes's last big bet comes in (three anchors) but the rozzers raid the joint and he doesn't get the winnings. Even worse, Sel sets Norm Cray onto a helpless Wes.
In one my favourite scenes, the Crown and Anchor table flips over to become the wool classing table that it was in its original usage.
In the morning, Wes meets "The Tainuia Kid" who is no fan of Sel. The last third of the film is Wes trying to get revenge on Sel. This is my least favourite part of both book and film as the jokey tone turns serious.
It's based on the classic book of the same name by Ronald Hugh Morrieson, and it is well worth seeking out. It is of its time with outdated language and mores but I don't care about that. You can't and shouldn't rewrite history. He lived in Hawera his whole life. This adaptation is more comic than the book but quite close to the meaning. The actors playing Wes and Cyril are older than I imagined the characters from the book, but that might just be me. And there's little room in the film for Don's dad, a veteran of Gallipoli who lost a leg there and is finding his old digger mates are dying off and he's turning old and sour, though he's trying hard not to. He was my favourite character in the book, but I can see how he's not suitable for a big part in what is essentially a comic adaptation.
A final mention to the wonderful rural New Zealand locations that were shot. I love the small towns and landscapes from back then.

Today marks the 339th birthday of Georg Philipp Telemann, by most accounts the most prolific composer in history source, writing more than 3000 pieces. Today is a good opportunity to remember his life and discuss his works, so I hope you all will join me below.
Biographical Outline:
Telemann's compositional career can roughly be split into two periods: 40 years with frequent movement, and 46 years spent in Hamburg.
1681-1721 The pre-Hamburg Years

• Born in Magdeburg, Brandenburg-Prussia on March 24, 1681
• After a childhood of secret music study (against his families wishes), he studied 4 years at the Hildesheim Gymnasium (1697-1701), and another 4 years at the Leipzig University (1701-1705). He became proficient in composing for and the teaching of all the common instruments, as well as becoming a skilled performer himself.
• From his 1705 graduation to 1712 (minus a brief excursion to Sorau, Poland), Telemann served under Duke Johann Wilhelm as Konzertmeister and Kapellmeister in Eisenach (this town may be familiar to some as J.S. Bach's birth-town).
• Moved to Frankfurt to serve as Kapellmeister at St. Catherines's Church (1712-1721) shortly after the death of his first wife (of only 2 years) during childbirth (1711)
• Married his second wife, Maria Textor, in 1714 (with which he had 9 children)
• Already by this point Telemann had authored a great many pieces: operas; dozens of cantatas; dozens of sonatas and concertos; dozens of suites and chamber pieces; his grand Brockes-Passion.

1721-1767 The Hamburg Years

• Telemann moved to Hamburg to accept the position of Kantor at the Johanneum Lateinschule in 1721; save for a few trips around Germany (and notably an 8-month stay in Paris in 1737) this is where he would stay for the rest of his life.
• His second wife racked up absurd amounts of gambling debts (more than Telemann's annual income) and was unfaithful. They no longer lived together by the 1730s, and she eventually left him for a Swedish officer.
• While his composition slowed down in the 1740s, he continued to compose into the 1760s.
• He died on June 25, 1767, after which his godson, C.P.E. Bach took over his Kantor position.

Notes on the Composer:

• As mentioned in the introduction, Telemann is regarded by most as the most prolific composer in history (a combination of his industriousness as well as his long life of 86 years).
• He was a personal friend to both J.S. Bach and G.F. Handel, which explains C.P.E. Bach being his godson (the "P." in his name is for Philipp).
• To his contemporaries, and at least until the complete takeover of the galant style, Telemann was regarded as the greatest living composer.
• Telemann was one of the earliest composers to focus on self-publishing, paving the way for later composer-publishers (notably C.P.E. Bach and Muzio Clementi).
• Telemann was also an accomplished writer. He wrote no less than three autobiographies (here is the last one, written in 1740), much poetry (more info here), and a great deal of writings on music theory and performance practice (still very useful to historically-informed ensembles and performers).
• His compositions after 1738, especially vocal compositions, have a notable French influence due to his enamoration with Rameau's opera "Castor et Pollux", which he saw performed in Paris.
• He was quite interested in hobby-gardening (especially later in life); from a letter of his: "I am insatiable where hyacinths and tulips are concerned, greedy for ranunculi, and especially for anemones".

Compositional Output:
For any genre, national style, or instrument one could think of in the mid-18th century, it can be certain that Telemann has a relevant composition. Passions, suites, concertos and sonatas for every instrument, cantatas by the hundreds, operas, oratorios, French, German, English, Italian, works for keyboard, works for specifically organ, etc etc etc...
Attempting to break them all down here would be fruitless; one might as well simply read an encyclopedic overview. As such, I will link this. At the bottom of the page is a "Partial List of Works", with links galore for anyone looking for a rabbit hole to go down.
Personal Favorites/Notable Works:
This list is not necessarily his "most important works", just ones I enjoy the most, as well as ones that stand out for their novelty or ingenuity.

• Overture-Suite in E Minor, TWV 55:e1 - This is just pure baroque craftsmanship right here.
  
• TWV 55:F11, "Alster": VII. Die Konzertierenden Frosche und Krahen - This translates to "concertizing frogs and crows", roughly. It is very easy to see why he titled it such. Quite an interesting piece for the 18th century (even today).
  
• Violin Concerto in A Major "Die Relinge" TWV 51:A4 - This title translates to "The Toad", in reference to the effects at this section; such beautiful sounds, inspired from such a course animal. Perhaps a bit more toad-like in this recording.
  
• Overture-Suite in B-flat major "Les Nations", TWV 55:B5 - This suite is pretty cool in concept, with each movement inspired by a different nationality (be sure to read the description). I particularly like the Russian section, where you can hear the bells. Here is a live (different) performance for those who like to the musicians.
  
• Cantata 'Lobet den Herrn, alle seine Heerscharen' TWV 1:1061 - For those that like this kind of music, this cantata is a real treat. I adore this aria
  
• Oboe Concerto in C minor. TWV 51:c1 - Give the opening a listening before reading further. Yes: that was indeed a fourth-inversion diminished 9th chord, built on the leading tone. Yes: this is the early 18th century. No: the harmony wasn't created with any kind of suspensions or passing tones; it is an honest-to-god diminished 9th chord. Very cool stuff. It shows that Telemann was creative when it came to him looking for a particular effect. The Allegro and Vivace seem to be linked by a little falling motif (a 5th and a 3rd, respectively), and are separated by a beautifully lyrical andante. Sheet Music
  
• Don Quixote Suite - Perhaps only because Don Quixote is one of my favorite novels, but I think this suite is pretty creative and fun.
  
• Tafelmusik - The first piece I linked is part of his collection of "Tafelmusik", and I feel obligated to link the whole collection here, not only for the collection's importance, but also its incredible musicality. The video has time-stamps in the description, and [this](shorturl.at/sACIM) Wikipedia page has some good information on the set (I usually don't like just linking Wikipedia pages, but everything in this I already know to be accurate, and its a concise collection of good info). I like his cute little poem (that rhymes in German), as well as the anecdote with Handel. Besides the first one in E Minor, I'm a fan of this one: particularly the vivace and the cantabile
  
• Paris Quartets - These aren't to be mistaken with what we nowadays think to be a "quartet", the only similarity is the number of instruments (minus the continuo). I once again feel obligated to link these here, for similar reasons to my linking of his tafelmusik. I would also like to leave this Wikipedia page, with the same disclaimer as before. It's quite difficult to pick a favorite out of this set, but I would recommend listening to the first concerto as well as the first suite.
  
• I talk about some keyboard fantasias of his here
  

Afterthoughts:
Telemann is absolutely a towering figure of music, who has tragically been ignored through most of the 19th century, only beginning to be "re-discovered" in the 1920s and 1930s (yet still often tragically underrated). His influence on composers like Bach and Handel is self evident in the latter two composers' music, but also in the admiration they both had for Telemann and his many published works that found their way all over Europe.
I have spent many pleasant hours with the composer, and yet surely have only heard a fraction of his works. I would be more than happy for everyone's favorites of him to be shared below in the comments, along with any anecdotes or questions. In the end, I'm just happy to share a small part of this towering figure~

The NBA season is about a quarter of the way through the long race of the regular season. Some teams have galloped out to great starts -- some teams have stumbled out of the gates -- and some teams look like a horse who broke his leg and needs to get sent to the glue factory.
Our intention with this new series to focus on some of those ailing squads and offer some possible remedies for their long-term health. So today, let's start with everyone's favorite punching bag:

THE NEW YORK KNICKS

Misdiagnosis: James Dolanitis
Beating up on Knicks owner James Dolan is nothing new; fans and media pundits have been doing it for years now.
And while it's fun to make fun of "JD" and his music, there's not much purpose to it. Sure, it'd be great if some billionaire like Jeff Bezos throws $3 billion at Dolan to make him go away. But barring some shenanigans or some V. Stivianos that we don't know about, you can't boot an owner out for being bad at his job.
In some ways, Dolan has become an easy scapegoat for the franchise's problems. A few years ago, Sports Illustrated's Chris Mannix (normally a good analyst) was ranting about Dolan on his yahoo podcast. He's a terrible owner! He's too hands-off! He "lets the inmates run the asylum!" (re: Phil Jackson at the time.) Literally 20 minutes later in the same podcast, Mannix complimented Spurs' owner Peter Holt. Why? Because he's hands-off. Because "he lets the basketball people make basketball decisions." Basically: exactly what he complained about with Dolan. Clearly, Dolan's problem wasn't his approach, but rather his decision making and the people he had trusted. However, presuming he finds the right leadership up top, his laissez faire approach to the franchise can work.
That said, he may need some help to make those choices, so we're going to help him out here so he can focus on giving us some more of those sweet sweet jams.
Diagnosis: Front Office Flu
In terms of the basketball operations, the Knicks are run by two men: president Scott Mills and GM Scott Perry. Of the two, Mills has been around longer; he was hired for the job back in 2013. Since then, the Knicks have not had a single winning season. That's 7 seasons (counting this year) of basketball, 6 different coaches, and an overall 167-348 record.
Mills brought in Scott Perry to serve as GM in 2017 at a time when Perry had a solid basketball reputation. However, we can't say much for Perry's tenure with the team so far. The degree of difficulty for the job may have been high, but he's struggled even when graded on a curve. There's simply no excuse for the shoddy roster construction this year. If you want a young big man scorer like Julius Randle or Bobby Portis? That's fine; but you don't need both. You want a tough veteran mentor like Taj Gibson or Marcus Morris? That's fine; but you don't need both. The Knicks have created a logjam that's not surprisingly led to a disastrous start.
The franchise has now attempted to scapegoat David Fizdale, but there's a problem with that; Mills and Perry are the ones who hired Fizdale in the first place. And the ones who fired him after 1.25 years on the job. Either they made a massive mistake when hiring him or a mistake by firing him; either way, that blood is on their hands.
Given that, why should they be the ones to hire a new coach? The very concept is flawed from the start. Front offices and head coaches need to work in lockstep with each other. Their fates are often tied to each other. If you're a promising head coach, you don't want to hitch your wagon to a front office that's already on the ropes. Whether they get fired or not this season, Mills and Perry don't have much job security and don't have much protection to offer you.
At this point, the Knicks need a fresh start, starting at the top (acknowledging that we can't chop off the very top with Dolan.) A new GM/basketball czar would be empowered to hire his own head coach, and hopefully one that would be on the same page with them from the start.
Prescription: Headhunt for a Head Man
In an ideal world, the general manager is the "boss" of the basketball side of the operations, with the head coach working under him. And in an ideal world, the head coach is the "boss" of the players themselves, who work under his direction. Of course, the business of NBA basketball isn't that cut and dry. There are clearly NBA stars who have more power than their head coaches, and there are clearly head coaches who have more power than their general managers. We're not fighting against that system by any means.
But that said, it's important to acknowledge that a clear sense of hierarchy is helpful when organizing a front office. We need to hire a "head man" who will be the ultimate decision maker in the room. That can be a powerful executive (who will then be in charge of hiring and firing a head coach), OR it can be a powerful coach (who will utilize the "GM" as a right-hand man for him.)
When it comes to recruiting executives, the team should shoot for the stars. Kevin Durant (and other players) have pointed out that the New York Knicks aren't exactly the "New York Knicks" to today's generation of superstar players. After all, these players weren't alive when the Knicks were actually a prestigious franchise. But that said, the "Knicks" as a franchise may be more appealing to a superstar executive. For one, execs tend to be older and more nostalgic for the past when New York City was one of the epicenters of basketball. Moreover, they may like the challenge of this particular role. Any GM who can rebuild the Knicks into title contenders would become a legend in his own right.
Given that, the Knicks may as well aim high when it comes to their initial search. Toronto's Masai Uriji is the current head on the GM totem pole. He's unlikely to leave Toronto right now (especially with the team rolling again post-Kawhi), but it's worth a call. Similarly, it's worth dialing in to see just how much that whole Hong Kong drama has affected Houston owner Tilman Fertitta and GM Daryl Morey. Personally, I'd back Morey in terms of free speech and his basketball acumen, but owners can sometimes value Money > Morey. It's also worth checking in to see if there's any tension in the long-term marriage between Oklahoma City and GM Sam Presti. Presti's resume isn't spotless, but if you take some big swings then you're going to strike out once and a while. Overall, he's still one of the better executives in basketball.
Again, those are all big names -- AKA unrealistic choices. If they rebuff us, we'd have to move on to Plan B. That is: the rising GM. There are a few top executives that currently share power in some form or another, and may be intrigued by the idea of full control. Chief among those would be Boston assistant GM Mike Zarren, Danny Ainge's right-hand man. The intellectual and experienced Zarren has rebuffed jobs in the past, but there wouldn't be many higher profile jobs than this one. In a similar vein, the Knicks should reach out to Denver president Tim Connelly -- who shares at least some responsibility with GM Arturas Karnisovas -- and Troy Weaver -- who is the lieutenant for Presti in OKC.
Another fun name to file away for the future: former Knick Landry Fields, who is currently serving as a scout in the San Antonio Spurs organization. As a Stanford grad, Fields is clearly a bright guy with a bright future. Handing him a GM job right now would be a stretch, but he's the type of executive who can develop into a GM down the road. Getting him in the building now and letting him rise the ladder would be a smart long-term move for the team.
Clearly, these executives would all serve in different capacities. If you actually pry away a GM like Daryl Morey, then they would have a lot of power and juice in the organization. They would be the loudest voice in any room. If it's a lesser-known name like Troy Weaver or Landry Fields, then they may have to take their cues from a powerful head coach.
Treatment Plan, p1: Avoid Excess Water (aka a "Big Splash!") at head coach
There's a perception (not surprisingly fueled by the media) that a coach in New York needs to be media friendly. Big names! Camera friendly faces! Someone who can charm reporters and free agents alike!
Spoiler alert: no one cares. Or at least, no one should care. After the Knicks hired media-darling and esteemed FoL (Friend of LeBron) David Fizdale, they promptly struck out with free agents and stunk up the court. Meanwhile, the nearby Brooklyn Nets had taken a different approach to their young roster. They had hired Kenny Atkinson, a largely anonymous assistant in Atlanta. Atkinson wasn't a "sexy" pick, but he was a smart one -- he had a lot of experience in a winning program, was fully versed in modern basketball, and prioritized player development. The Nets didn't flip a switch overnight, but they got better bit by bit, and eventually became good enough of a team to land superstars like Kevin Durant and Kyrie Irving.
Similarly, the Knicks should target rising star assistant coaches who can help revamp their playing style to the new era of basketball and analytics. "Pace and space" was not their forte. Under Fizdale, the Knicks ranked 28th in pace of play. They also struggled with spacing (albeit a roster construction problem as well.)
Some older coaches manage to adapt to the modern era, but it'd be a gamble to bank on a leopard to change his spots. One of the primary names you hear linked to this opening is former Golden State coach Mark Jackson. Jackson did an admirable job with the Warriors defense, but his offense (with Steph Curry and Klay Thompson) ranked 11th and 12th respectively in his two years at the helm. One year later, Steve Kerr unleashed the full potential of those shooters and had the team ranked in the top 3 in offensive rating for the next five years. Jackson also struggled behind the scenes with his staff. In the broadcast booth, he hasn't demonstrated any particular insight that make you think he's some coaching guru. Frankly, hiring Mark Jackson for this job would likely be doomed to failure.
I wouldn't suggest that possible candidate Jason Kidd would be "doomed," but he's struggled with stubbornness in the past himself (particularly with his defensive system.) Jeff Van Gundy is another big name who is angling for another job, but may be too stuck in the past as well (even presuming his curmudgeonly broadcast persona is 80% comedic schtick.)
There are a few "big names" that I actually think would do well in this post (Villanova coach Jay Wright and perhaps Clippers assistant Ty Lue come to mind) but the Knicks should feel comfortable with a "no name" as well, presuming it's the right one.
In the interest of time, let's shine the spotlight on only a few. New Orleans assistant Chris Finch is an uptempo offensive guru. Portland assistant Nate Tibbetts specializes in player development -- always a key for rebuilding teams. Former Portland assistant David Vanterpool has been a coaching candidate in the past, and has only seen his stock rise after moving over to Minnesota and helping the T-Wolves defense improve from last season.
Other candidates to consider include: Darvin Ham (MIL), Jay Larranaga (BOS), Ime Udoka (PHI), Dan Burke (IND), Chris Fleming (CHI), Alex Jensen (UTA), Wes Unseld Jr. (DEN), and Jordi Fernandez (DEN). Never heard of these dudes? Good. We need a coach -- not a headline. With that in mind, the Knicks should treat this season as a legitimate audition for interim Mike Miller. He's the 2nd most famous Mike Miller in NBA circles, but he's done well in the G-League and deserves a chance to show his worth.
Treatment Plan, p2: Avoid Drinking Sand
In The American President (1995), Michael J. Fox's Lewis Rothschild character gives a memorable (and oddly prescient) monologue to the titular character. "People want leadership, Mr. President. In the absence of genuine leadership, they'll listen to anyone who steps up to the microphone. They want leadership. They're so thirsty for it they'll crawl through the desert toward a mirage, and when they discover there's no water, they'll drink the sand."
That doesn't just describe voters; it can describe fan bases as well. When you're a long-suffering fan of a team that appears in a perpetual rebuild, you can sometimes overreact and overrate your young talent out of desperation for any source of optimism. That may apply to these Knicks coming into this year. Yes, the franchise had young players with pedigree, but that doesn't necessarily mean that they were actual foundational pieces. Last year's lottery pick Kevin Knox has taken only a moderate step up in Year 2 (from 47.5% to 51.0% in terms of true shooting) and may top out as a 4th or 5th starter someday. Meanwhile, in Year 3, PG Dennis Smith still looks as inefficient as ever. He hasn't been 100% healthy, but his true shooting of 39.2% is actually a sizable step backwards right now. And while Knicks fans may continue to stump for Frank Ntilikina and his defensive impact, his offense is still so far away that he's unlikely to be anything more than a 5th starter or rotational player himself.
If you're looking for true star talent that you can actually build a winning program around, then the Knicks' options are more limited. Mitchell Robinson should eventually lock into a full-time starting role, and R.J. Barrett may eventually develop into a high-end starter himself. Barrett's rookie year has been a mixed bag so far, but that's about what you'd expect of a 19 year old who isn't Luka Doncic. Barrett has shown his limitations as a shooter (40%-31%-53% splits), but has also shown his ability to attack and utilize his size as a scorer and rebounder for his position. At the moment, he's averaging 14-5-3, but he could eventually get up to the 24-6-5 range with a more refined shooting stroke and better talent around him.
Given that upside, the Knicks need to be diligent to find the right kind of talent around Barrett. Sure, his shooting may improve to some degree, but he's unlikely to ever be a great shooter. If he can get up to league average, then they should count that as a win. In order to draw out the most of his talent (and limit his weaknesses) the Knicks can't clog the court with mediocre-shooting big men. In an ideal world, they need to surround Barrett with 4 good shooters. In a more realistic world, 3 good shooters + 1 good big man (hopefully Robinson) is a solid goal. That type of lineup should maximize Barrett's productivity, given his ability to drive and playmake for others.
One challenge for fulfilling that vision (of Barrett as the primary playmaker) is that this particular draft class is heavy with natural lead guards. LaMelo Ball and R.J. Hampton (both in Oceania) are considered lottery locks, as are NCAA point guards like Cole Anthony (UNC), Nico Mannion (Arizona), and Tyrese Maxey (Kentucky). French guards Theo Maledon and Killian Hayes may join them as well. The Knicks need to be careful about which of these guards would fit with Barrett, and which may clash.
To be clear, I'm not suggesting that the Knicks bypass a superior talent simply because they may not fit as neatly with R.J. Barrett. The top talent in the class may be Georgia SG Anthony Edwards, a big power guard who reminds some of Dwyane Wade or Donovan Mitchell. Is that an ideal fit next to Barrett? Maybe not -- but the talent would override that. Similarly, Memphis C James Wiseman may overlap with Mitchell Robinson on defense to some degree, but he's a legitimate top 3 talent who should be taken regardless.
However, if there's a tie regarding talent, then "fit" needs to win out. Primarily, I'd question the fit between Barrett and someone like Cole Anthony (considered by most to be the # 1 PG.) Anthony's primary virtue is his ability to attack and score. He's averaging 20.0 PPG as a freshman. That said, he also has questionable efficiency (38% from the field) and only averages 3.9 assists per game. He can also drift defensively when he's not on the ball. Pairing a score-first PG like that with Barrett may not be the best use of either of their talents.
If the season ended today, the Knicks would be slotted into the # 1 spot (same as last year) and end up picking anywhere from 1 to 5. That pick should represent their best and perhaps last chance to find a franchise talent to pair with Barrett. They just need to make sure it's the right pairing as well.
Prognosis: Planning for your Long-Term Health
The Knicks' season has been a massive disappointment so far, but it may not matter much in the long run. After all, this is a team whose Vegas oveunder was only about 28 or so depending on your preferred book. At the end of the day, it won't change much whether they end up winning 30 games or 20 games. In some ways, it was always going to be a lost cause.
However, this season's underachievement (even by those low standards) should remind the front office and franchise as a whole a lesson about reasonable expectations. After the team struck out on the top superstars, they were not going to be a competitive club. Signing expensive veterans and trying to chase the 8th seed didn't make a lot of sense. Tying up long-term money (everyone but Bobby Portis will be paid money through next season) didn't make a lot of sense. Edit: thanks to u/the_madstork for catching my mistake here. Aside from Randle, most of the other signings have partial guarantees for next year.
Stills, because of their salary commitments through 2020-21, the Knicks likely won't be much better next year at all. And that's fine. This wasn't going to be the Knicks' season, and 2020-21 wasn't going to be their season either. However, they can make a realistic goal of improvement. Gradual, slow, steady. If this year's team finishes 20-62, then next year's goal should be to win 25-30 games. Those improvements need to come internally as well. R.J. Barrett and Kevin Knox need to get more efficient; Mitchell Robinson needs to get steadier. The team shouldn't chase mediocre veteran starters anymore; let the young'ins take their lumps and experience their growing pains. If you utilize any extra salary cap, it should be to take on toxic assets that come attached with actual assets in turn (taking another page from Sean Marks and Brooklyn.)
If we're saying the team is going to be bad in 2019-20 (this year) and 2020-21 (next year), then when are we projecting them to turn the corner and actually be good? Hell, it may take quite a while. In 2021-22, R.J. Barrett will still only be 21, and this year's lottery pick will likely be around the same age. If they stay steady on the course of this rebuild, 2021-22 may be another "losing" year as well. And again, that's okay. Let's shoot for that same moderate and internal improvement. If we can go from 25-30 wins up to 35-40, then that's still on the right track.
As the media often points out, the New York market is still a draw, and the "Knicks" name can be a theoretical draw as well. The trap that the current front office fell into was thinking that alone would be enough to land superstar free agents. But as we've seen by virtually every major free agent decision of this decade, superstars don't want to build from the ground up. Either they want to form super teams, or they want to join solid rosters that are one or two pieces away from contention. This past offseason, we saw that twice as Irving+Durant went to a solid Brooklyn team, and Kawhi Leonard+Paul George went to a solid L.A. Clippers team. Those superstar duos didn't go to start from scratch; they went to push the team over the top.
In that same way, the Knicks need to set the foundation for that superstar coup -- in the far rungs of the future. Anthony Davis is a free agent this summer -- Giannis Antetokounmpo will be a free agent in Summer 2021. Both of those are unrealistic timelines for this young Knicks team to get good enough, so let's keep kicking the can down the road. If we start thinking about 2023 as a time to strike, then suddenly our options expand. Among the free agents currently slated for that class include: SG Bradley Beal, C Nikola Jokic, C Myles Turner, C Joel Embiid, etc. The summer of 2024 may be the ultimate window for this team. The free agent class would include stars like SG Devin Booker, C Karl-Anthony Towns, and a plucky and untested young rookie by the name of Zion Williamson (who happens to be BFF with our own R.J. Barrett.)
Now, clearly, 2024 is a long time from now. A lot can change by then. Hell, the United States could splinter up into 13 countries and 8 different NBAs by then. And more realistically, 90% of those listed free agents will re-sign with their current teams by then. However, the Knicks don't need to be Ash and catch 'em all; they only need to target 1 or 2 that can push them over the top. And THAT, more than anything else, is the proper plan forward for this team. This current core doesn't need to be a title team on their own; they need to be good enough to be "one piece away." If the Knicks can take small, measured, and intelligent steps in the meantime, that path forward can be the cure for the chaos and indecision that has ailed them for years now.

So I had the random idea of compiling a small guide to modern German slang since I know slang is barely taught in textbooks and courses, if at all. And the slangs that are being taught are either very limited or a little out-of-date. So here's my try to get some of the most common slang terms into a list! Hope it'll help someone here. I tried to include some regionalisms but there are a lot.
For those who just wanted to check out the dirty talk, sweaing and insults, scroll to the last section.
jdn. = jemanden, jmd. = jemandem, etw. = etwas

Common slang terms

German expression	Grammar	Example	Meaning/equivalent expr.
abgehoben sein	-	Die sind mir viel zu abgehoben!	to be out of touch
abhauen	alt.: abdampfen	Sie ist einfach abgehauen!	to disappeato flee/to go away, can have the meaning of reinhauen as well
Alter!	-	Alter, reiß dich jetzt zusammen!	'Old one', dude
Alter Schwede!	expr., alt.: Alter Falter!	Alter Schwede war das steil, ich brauche was zum trinken!	'Old swede'; expressing astonishment/surprise, the alternative expression rhymes.
Asi, der	pl. Asis, alt. spelling: Assi	Boah ne, da kommt so eine Gruppe Asis angerannt.	abbrev. for 'Asozialer', anti-socials, lower-class people
an etw. ziehen/eine ziehen	-	Ich zieh mir mal eine!	to smoke weed (sometimes also cig)
auf etw. pfeifen	vulg. alt.: auf etw. scheißen	Ich pfeif auf die, sollen die sich doch jemand anderen suchen!	'to whistle on sth.'; to ignore/disregard sth.
auf/mit jmd./etw. nicht klarkommen	-	Ich komm einfach mit deiner Art nicht klar! Sie kommt darauf nicht klar!	unable to deal with so/sth.
auf etw. Bock haben	-	Wir wollen am Wochenende an den See, hast du Bock?	to be up/down for sth.
bekloppt/bescheuert sein	-	Bist du bekloppt oder so?!	slang for to be mad/crazy/wrong
besoffen/zu/dicht sein	-	Ne, dafür bin ich gerade zu dicht!	being drunk/wasted
Bonze, der	pl. Bonzen	Der Typ ist aber auch echt ein Bonze.	derogatory term for posh/wealthy and slightly arrogant people
Dicker, der	alt. casual spelling: dicka, dikah	Dicker, hast du das gesehen?!	'Fat one', even more casual than 'Alter'
die/eine volle Breitseite (auf etw.) geben/feuern	expr.	Die Zeitung hat heute eine volle Breitseite auf die Regierung abgefeuert.	'to fire with the broadside', refering to giving heavy fire during naval combat in the past; idiom for going on a major offensive for something
eine Macke kriegen	alt.: bekommen	Ich kriege noch eine Macke bei der Musik!	to go crazy, but 'eine Macke haben' means 'to be crazy/mad'
etw. geht den Bach runter	-	Meine ganze Karriere geht gerade den Bach runter!	to go down the drain
etw. läuft schief	alt.: geht	Anfangs fand ich alles noch übersichtlich, aber dann ging alles schief!	sth. goes wrong
etw. saufen, Saufen gehen	-	Wollen wir heute nach der Arbeit noch saufen gehen?	to go out for a drink (usually to get drunk)
etw. verkacken	-	Das Projekt habe ich total verkackt!	to fail miserably at sth., to shit the bed when doing sth.
Fresse, die	-	Deine Fresse wird auch immer hässlicher! Meine Fresse diese Hitze! [Meine Fresse expressing surprise/astonishment similar to 'Heavens', 'Good grief', 'wow']	slang term for face
Gusche, die	regionalism, alt. spelling: Gosche	Halt die Gusche jetzt!	regional term for mouth
Haussegen, der	-	Bei euch hängt der Haussegen schief?	'house blessing', refering to a harmonious living arrangement, usually within a family. 'Der Haussegen hängt schief' usually means having a big argument within a family/couple
hibbelig sein	-	Ich bin gerade voll hibbelig, vielleicht treffe ich ihn ja wieder	slang for 'to be excited, nervous'
Hund, der	-	Du bist so ein Hund ey!	dog, usually implies someone isn't honorable/is spineless when used in the negative
in die Heia gehen	-	Ab in die Heia jetzt, du musst morgen früh aufstehen!	childish way of saying 'going to sleep'
jdn. aufreißen	-	Hattest du am Wochenende erfolgreiche eine Frau aufgerissen?	to hook up with so. or to get a man/woman
jdn. klatschen	-	Ich klatsch dich gleich, halt die Schnauze.	slang for 'to slap', usually lower-class speak
jdn. messern	-	Isch messer disch!	slang term for stabbing/roughing someone up, low-class immigrant speak
jdn. verarschen	alt.: veräppeln	Sie wurde komplett von ihm verarscht, füht er sich nicht schlecht?	to cheat, to lie, to betray so.
jmd. auf die Palme gehen	alt.: auf den ZeigeWeckeSenkel	Die geht mir schon jetzt auf die Palme.	to get annoyed by so.
jmd. eine reinhauen	-	Sie hat ihm unabsichtlich eine reingehauen!	to punch so.
jmd. etw. übel nehmen	-	Ich hoffe das nimmt er mir nicht übel!	to get mad at so. for sth.
Kippe, die	-	Hast du noch Kippen übrig?	slang for cigarette
(Kuh-)Kaff, das	-	Ich bin aus einem Kaff hier hergezogen.	slang for tiny village, small town, somewhat derogative
kleckern	-	Jetzt klecker nicht den ganzen Tisch voll!	to spill sth. while drinking/eating
kotzen	-	Der Geruch ist so widerlich, ich kotz gleich!	to puke
Lusche, die	-	Vergiss den, voll die Lusche!	derogatory: loser
Maul, das	-	Du hast echt ein großes Maul.	slang term for human mouths, designated term for the mouths of animals
mit jdm. Zoff haben	-	Hast du nachher Zeit, ich bräuchte deinen Rat, wir haben schon wieder Zoff gehabt!	to have an argument with so.
Pampa, die	-	Das hier ist die totale Pampa, jetzt dreh um und fahr wieder zurück!	slang for no-mans land, wilderness, 'no civilization in sight', somewhat derogative
Popel, der	-	Ich habe gerade einen großen Popel rausgefischt!	slang for bugger
ranzig sein	-	Das ist ja total ranzig!	'to be rancit' - used as a negative, expressing annoyance
reinhauen	-	Ich haue jetzt rein, ich habe morgen Frühschicht!	to get going
rumeiern	-	Jetzt eier da nicht rum, komm her und mach deine Arbeit!	to fumble around
rumnörgeln	alt.: rummaulen	Du hörst auch nicht auf rumzumaulen, das ist ja nicht auszuhalten!	to nag, to complain, to moan, to grumble
Südländer, -in	-	Südländer sehen total attraktiv aus!	'Southlander', slang for people coming from/having heritage in Mediterranean countries
Sau, die	-	Dann lass die Sau raus! [expr. having fun] Du bist aber eine richtig geile Sau!	'sow', either sexual slang or referring to someone being crazy/peculiadeviant
Schlamassel, das	-	Das ist ja das totale Schlamassel!	refers to a tricky situation
schlampig sein	-	Ich bin normalerweise recht schlampig zuhause!	to be unorganized, chaotic
Schnauze, die	-	Halt die Schnauze! Ich kann mich nicht an die Berliner Schnauze gewöhnen!	snout; slang for mouth; expr. 'Berliner Schnauze' refers to the manners of speech and dialect of Berlin
Semmel/Schrippe/Weck(er)le	regionalism, generic term: Brötchen	Eine Schrippe bitte! - Eine was?!	terms for bread roll; Berlin: Schrippe, SE: Semmel, SW: Weck(er)le, sometimes refering to a specific sort of bread roll
sich aufs Ohr hauen	alt.: legen	Ich hau mich auf Ohr, es ist spät!	slang for 'going to sleep'
sich besaufen	-	Ich will mich gerade wirklich besaufen, so schlimm ist das!	to get wasted
sich die volle Dröhnung geben	-	Ich habe mir am letzten Wochenende die volle Dröhnung gegeben.	slang for getting a lot of something in a short amount of time, mostly either loud music on concerts or getting high on drugs
sich etw. reinziehen	-	Ich habe mir am Wochenende Game of Thrones reingezogen!	slang for 'to get into sth.', can refer to drugs
Todes[noun]	alt.: [noun] des Todes	Ich habe gerade Todesschmerzen!	word to emphasize intensity, usually something negative
Vitamin B	-	Ich habe die Wohnung auch nur durch etwas Vitamin B gekriegt.	refers to having informal/private connections
etw. wieder geradebiegen	-	Ich biege das wieder gerade, versprochen!	to straighten sth. out
etw. verzocken	-	Ich habe gerade zwei Hunderter verzockt!	slang for 'to gamble away'
von jdm. abgezockt werden	alt.: abgezogen	Frechheit, ich wurde von der total abgezockt!	to get ripped off by so.
überrumpelt von etw./jmd. sein	-	Ich bin gerade von deinem Geständnis total überrumpelt worden.	to get surprised with sth./so. and not knowing what to do/say
(etw.) zocken	-	Lass mal PS4 zocken.	slang for 'to play games'

NSFW section

The list contains a lot of vulgar slang, use with caution and some rather not at all. To make it a bit more understandable, I created simple categories for the severity of these in either vulgarity or swearing intensity and when to use it.
​

casual slang	vulgar slang	(serious) insult	'wtf did you just say to me?!'	used during sexy times
C	V	I	!	S

I didn't include Anglicisms since they usually retain their original meaning.

Sex-related expr.	Grammar	Examples	Meaning	Category
(ab-)spritzen	alt.: absahnen	Ich habe seit einer Woche nicht abgespritzt!	'to squirt'; refers mostly just to men ejaculating	V, S
(an jdm.) rumfummeln, rummachen	-	Habt ihr mehr als nur rumgemacht? Dieses rumgemache von Paaren in der Öffentlichkeit nervt!	to make out	C, V, S
Arsch, der	-	Ihr Arsch sieht echt der Hammer! So'n Arsch!	ass	versatile
Arschgeige, die	-	Was für eine Arschgeige, geht's noch?!	'ass violin'; ass(-hole)	C, V, I
(Arsch-)loch, das	-	Lass mich an dein Loch! Was für ein Arschloch!!	(ass-)hole	versatile
(Arsch-)Ritze, die	-	Zeig mal deine Ritze du Sau!	ass crack	V, S
Bettsport machen	alt.: treiben	Am Wochenende wird wieder Bettsport gemacht, ich freu mich so sehr!	'to do bed sports'; to have sex, to hook up	C
Eier, die	alt.: Kronjuwelen	Meine Eier tun mir gerade total weh.	'eggs'; balls	C, V, S
etw. in jdn. reinhämmern	-	Sie will dass ich ihr einen Dildo reinhämmere.	to ram sth into so.	V, S
etw. macht/turnt jdn. an	alt. spelling: antörnen	Deine Muskeln machen mich total an!	to be turned on by sth	C, V, S
es machen	alt.: treiben	Meine Nachbarn treiben es zum dritten Mal heute, die sollen Ruhe geben!	slang for 'to have sex'	C, V, S
es sich machen	-	Ich mache es mir gerade selbst.	slang for to masturbate	C, V, S
es jmd. geben	-	Er hat es ihr gegeben!	to give it to so.	C, V, S
Ficker, der	-	Was für ein krasser Ficker!	fucker	versatile
Fickstück, das	-	Du geiles Fickstück!	'fuck piece', usually label for women during sex, sometimes for males	V with male friends, S
(jdn./etw.) ficken	-	Fick sie härter! Ach fick dich doch ins Knie! [expr. 'fuck off'/'fuck you'; V, I] Ich ficke diese Stadt!	to fuck	versatile
Fotze, die	-	Du kleines Fotzenkind! Ich will in deine feuchte Fotze stoßen!	cunt when used as !, pussy when used as S	!, S
Geilheit, die	-	Ich weiß nicht warum aber meine Geilheit lässt heute echt nicht nach!	horniness	C, V, S
Hengst, der	-	Hat dich den Hengst wieder bestiegen?	stallion, slang for men	C, V, S
jdn. blasen	alt.: jmd einen blasen	Meine Freundin hat mich letztens geblasen.	to give head	V, S
jdn. bumsen	-	Lass mal bumsen! Bumst ihr nicht?!	childish way of saying 'to have sex'	C
jdn. den/am Arsch lecken	-	Leck mich am Arsch	lick so. ass	V, I, S
jdn. reiten	-	Reitest du mich heute?	to ride so.	S
jdn. von hinten nehmen	-	Nimm mich bitte von hinten!	'to take so. from behind'; anal	V, S
jdn./etw. rammeln	-	Die rammeln aber auch ganz schön heftig!	to fuck, but less vulgar	V
jdn. (ran-)nehmen	-	Du nimmst sie ganz schön ran ne? Nimm mich tief!	'to take so'; to fuck but less vulgar	V, S
jmd. einen runterholen	reflexive verb sich einen runterholen	Sitzt er wieder mit einem Porno da und holt sich einen runter?! Der holt sich auch immer auf seine eigene Klugheit einen runter.	to jerk off, to (sexually) gratify so.	V, S
kommen	-	Ich komme gleich!	to come	V, S
Latte, die	-	Meine Latte ist gerade extrem hart!	hard-on	V, S
mit jdm. in die Kiste steigen/hüpfen	alt. nouns: ins Bett, in den Sack	Ich wusste es, du stiegst mit ihm in die Kiste!	'to get into bed with so'; to have sex	C
Möse, die	-	Deine Möse ist so geil!	pussy	V, S
Mumu, die	-	Ich glaube mit meiner Mumu stimmt was nicht!	childish way to refer to the vagina	C, V, not so much S
Muschi, die	-	Meine Muschi ist gerade wieder total feucht!	silly way to refer to the vagina	V, S
notgeil sein	alt: rattig	Ich bin seit zwei Tagen total notgeil!	to be horny	V, S
Nutte, die	-	Die zieht sich ja an wie eine Nutte!	slang for prositute, slut	V, I, S
Olle, die/Alte, die	-	Hast du eine Olle kriegen können? Meine Alte nervt mal wieder total!	pej. slang for women	V, I
Pimmel, der	-	Mein Pimmel hat heute keine Lust.	dick	V, S
Sahne, die	-	Was für eine Schlampe!	cream; cum	V, S
Schlampe, die	-	Die ist aber auch eine geile Schlampe!	slut	V, I, S
Schwanz, der	-	Sie hat gesagt mein Schwanz sei etwas groß.	'tail'; cock	V, I, S
sich an etw. aufgeilen	-	Deine Bilder geilen mich auf! Extrem arrogant, der geilt sich sicherlich an seinem eigenen Spiegelbild auf!	to get horny over sth	V, S
sich einen rubbeln	-	Ich rubbel mir gerade einen.	'to rub'; to masturbate (mostly refering to males)	C, V, S
Spalt, deSpalte, die	-	Ich will in ihre Spalte rein.	slit, refering to a pussy during sex	V, S
Stute, die	-	Du geile Stute, bist wieder bereit?	mare, female horse, slang for women during sex	V, S
Titten, die	-	Ihre Titten sind echt krass!	tits	V, S
(jdn./etw.) vögeln	-	Ich glaube die vögeln hinter dem Busch!	slang for to have sex	C, V, S
Wichser, der	-	Du Wichser!	wanker	V with friends, I
Wichse, die	-	Ihh, da ist wieder Wichse an der Wand!	cum	V, S
wichsen	also reflexive	Ich wichs mich gerade! Die wichsen doch gerade nicht wieder, oder?!	to wank	V, S
Ethnicity/Race-related	Grammar	Examples	Meaning	Category
Alman, der	pl. Almans	Boah, hör auf so ein richtiger Alman zu sein!	slang for Germanized Turks/second gen., used within the German-Turkish community	C, I
Ami, der	pl. Amis	Die Amis müssen natürlich wieder ihr eigenes Ding machen.	casual slang for Americans, used in the pejorative in political debates	C, I
Franze, die/Franzmann, der	-	Ach diese Franzmänner!	sluslang for French people	C, I
(deutsche) Kartoffel, die	-	Du bist aber so eine richtige deutsche Kartoffel manchmal!	'German potato', refering to ethnic Germans and stereotypes	C
Japse, der	pl. Japsen	Boah, diese Japsen nerven!	slur for Japanese people	I, !
Kanacke, der	pl. Kanacken	Der benimmst sich auch wie ein echter Kanacke mit seinem BMW da!	slur for Turkish people, applies to Middle Easterners in general	I, ! but increasingly used as V by second gen. themselves
Kraut, das	usually only with indefinite article	Kein Wunder wenn die anderen sagen, dass du echt ein Kraut bist.	similar to 'Kartoffel'	C
Musel, der	pl. Musels	Ist das nicht der Bezirk voller Musels?!	slur for Muslims, especially among old-school right-wing Germans	I, !
NegeNegro, der	pl. NegeNegros	Schon wieder diese Neger!	negro, slur for black people	!, maybe S but not sure
Polake, der	pl. Polaken, no f.	Die Polacken kommen, sichert eure Autos!	polaks, slur for Polish people	I, !, rarely V
Schlitzauge	no article or indef. article	Du Schlitzauge!	slur for Asian people in general	I, !

Sorry for any formatting issues, I tried my best!
EDIT: typos, added new stuff, thank you stranger for the gold :)

Warning: Mild Spoilers for Kaiji: Ultimate Survivor, as well as its second season Against All Odds.
In a Discord server I mod, one of the bots has an option to gamble with a virtual currency. You gain coins by scoring in a coveted top-three spot for any given artist. The gambling is limited to a single channel, fittingly called #gambling-den, and while at the start I have observed people gambling some of this fake currency, lately it’s full of users simply gambling “all”. I don’t have the channel muted, even though I should have, and I like to gamble all as well - just to see myself lose. Every time I return to the channel - not that this happens worryingly often, simply once in a while - I gamble with the intent of losing everything I got. Maybe this time, I tell myself, I will quit for good. Maybe this time, I will learn my lesson. After all, everything should be in moderation, and I always lose with these things (I was thinking of the gambling moments in the designated city in Pokémon games), and anyway, gambling is haram. Yet I never mute the channel, and I feel a low current in myself, the tip of a dynamite ready to spark: a sliver of a hope to raise the white numbers on a black background. A fuse kicks off when I do, and a cold wind blows out my flame when I don’t. Tough luck, I tell myself. Maybe next time.
Kaiji: Ultimate Survivor, and its successor Kaiji: Against All Odds tap into this vague rush of luck and unfold it into its extremes: innocuous games develop to sprawling plans of strategy and a deathly corrosion of empathy and selfishness; debt-riddled characters, beginning from the protagonist Itou Kaiji, that put their hope into said games, regardless what happens to their minds and bodies; and lastly, the owners of the devious games that enjoy the sight that presents itself. You could watch Kaiji and thank God your sense of gambling isn’t as severe as his -- but you could also watch Kaiji and see a millennial suffering through the uncaring systems of this world.
The first thing we know of twenty-one-year old Kaiji is that he’s just lost a gamble among friends. “The future is in our hands”, doubling both as opening title and poster in Kaiji’s single-room apartment, quickly unhinges on one side as if it sensed the viewer’s presence or realized the sheer crookedness of this statement. The narrator quickly adds with a grave voiceover that Kaiji lives in Tokyo for three years, hasn’t been employed since New Years, and that he is a bum. He spends his money on beer and gambles and likes to hang stolen emblems of foreign cars like trophies to be won in order to release the pent-up resentment. “Anyone who drives this car can’t be a good person, anyway,” Kaiji says with a petty smile on his face, but moments later, the reality of his situation crushes him: “It’s all about money,” he mutters, lying on the ground while a silent tear runs over his cheeks. Seasoned loan shark Endou pays Kaiji a visit moments to remind him of a debt he cosigned, its crushing interest raising it to unmanageable levels, all of which Kaiji has to pay for alone now. The only way out of it is to enter a ship named Espoir (French for “hope”), alongside an accompanying game: it will either clear his debt or put him into underground work for a year or two. Kaiji seems against it - he won’t pay the debt, and to hell with the ship. But Endou is quick to remind him that the worst possible outcome is to continue living like he does. The cruise could be a great opportunity to rid of this “loser” mentality that Kaiji has: his resignation to this life, as unhappy as it is. After all, the things Kaiji wants are always behind display cases, and could he ever think of buying the foreign cars he likes to mutilate? “You’ve given up from the beginning and are satisfied by the little pranks you play,” Endou says as a choir and organs wail dramatically behind him. “If you had ten million, would you do shit like that? Of course you wouldn’t!” Kaiji grunts, all too aware that Endou is right. Must be funny in the rich man’s world, ABBA have aptly sung in Money Money Money. almost four decades ago. Kaiji spends two seasons proving them right.
Early on in the first arc and in the game provided in the ship -- an adult men’s card game involving stars, money, a ticking clock, and rock-paper-scissors -- Kaiji mentions the desire to be better multiple times. “Once we get out of here,” he says, “let’s turn our life around. Let’s really try our best.” The game itself requires a hand of luck or the confidence to make his own choice, but as Kaiji fails to have either -- his cunning is reserved for self-interest at the morally purest level, and he’d rather have someone else choose for him -- he’s quickly scammed by the sly Funai. Kaiji finds himself two new friends to survive the game with, convinced that they wouldn’t betray him, and determined to get all three out of the ship hell or high water. The early winners enjoy the game from above with champagne flutes and stars pinned on their chest; the early losers find themselves doomed behind the game room, stripped bare both literally and mentally, dubbed as “hell” by both Kaiji and the narrator. As the four-hour time and card counters tick down ominously, an uneasy, tense electricity passes through the viewer and Kaiji’s face, which usually alternates between a worried face slick with sweat or wet with tears. To win three stars each for the three with a limited amount of cards and money proves itself a tightrope act, requiring Kaiji to plan on the fly as they are thwarted over and over. It comes as little surprise that the visual metaphors in this show usually revolve around abysses, darknesses, lighthouses, and bridges; red, violet, and blue swirls of dark thoughts and evil intent; monstrous hands that claw and pull at the characters; stretches of zawa, translated as “uneasy atmosphere”. Kaiji stops mentioning this elusive better life in progressing episodes, more focused on friendships and winning for their sake, but he doesn’t deny others of their dreams: in the climax of the first arc as well as one of its tensest moments, Kaiji hears the calls of a teary-eyed man and saves him from the literal hell that awaits him. Ironically, it is preceded by a betrayal of the earlier mentioned friends.
The show is about as subtle about its observations on capitalism as a sledgehammer flying your way. The ultimate antagonist is Hyoudou, an old and rich conglomerate head who admits he likes to see poor people like Kaiji struggle, that the only form of sincerity is in the face of crushing debt and pain; two henchmen act as players opposite Kaiji, both in season one and season two; the second season’s first game plays out in a prison for debtors, its second in a casino run by the conglomerate, while the Espoir is a sponsored affair. The second card game involves slaves that can win against emperors; a character aptly surmises that the poor don’t care about overthrowing the system, simply about being rich themselves. Kaiji has a difficult relationship with society, leading him to unemployment, but he needs to have money somehow. Unsurprisingly, he circles back to gambling, and back into the conglomerate’s hands. But there’s also Kaiji’s fellow debtors that work against him, equal in Kaiji in every way barring their moral stance: while Kaiji will think of a collective - two losers that could help him out on a ship, say, or a group of workers that owe the local kingpin money - these debtors are driven by a selfish sense of survival. Empathy, kindness, and respect: these are the coordinates that Kaiji operates in such high-risk situations, rewarded by men that believe in Kaiji’s good graces and help him the best they can. However, these virtues are juxtaposed with Kaiji’s vice to simply win: a gamble involving tissues that he thinks of on the fly; an accusation of theft that Kaiji seizes as opportunity to offer a gamble; the pachinko game that nobody can beat. “The fucking pigs that thought of this system, where everyone is taken advantage of, are laughing their asses off. The more we think about loss and gain, the more obsessed we become, the more we play into these fuckers’ hands!” Kaiji shouts; the next episode, he regrets that he’s helped out anyone to begin with; the episode after that, he starts crying at the prospect of (literally) pushing aside someone to win. By the second season, he actively begs for a new gamble, anything to rid of his broke state and clear his debts as swiftly as possible. He’s led by vague beliefs of reaching for the stars, but a moment later the narrator flips around the hopeful image: “Kaiji is back into the darkness of gambling, where the light of stars never reach.” But in the darkness, he finds the light of fellow men, ultimately able to dispel the fog for even a single moment.
“Kaiji, fated to lose, loses; Hyoudou, fated to win, wins,” recaps the narrator in the second season. It’s crucial that only Hyoudou is mentioned here; as much as capitalism favors companies that own as much as possible as fast as possible, there is always a single man behind the company, the ruler over the rulers. We like to think of this singular owner in order to relay it to us, to give ourselves motivation and despair both; this trick involving carrots and sticks is one frequently brought up in the show as well, by the people that think they can claim a part of capitalism’s cake. Tonegawa admonishes Kaiji until the game turns in on him, calling him trash and belittling his ability to strategize. He berates another character, Sahara, for even asking more than a fake ticket meaning nothing: “Whether you’re a salaryman or a bureaucrat, everyone is risking their lives for money!” The show makes no illusions on ordinary life: to work up, suck up to people they dislike, and barely save with money - that the characters that are racked up with debt have no way to mingle with that league. In one of the most emotional moments of the show, it draws a link between money ruling the solitary person, the solitary person’s isolation, and how connections are all that we have left. It ceases to be about the debts made, gained, regained, and cleared: as two characters ask one another if they’re okay, that they’re here, they can make it to the other side. I am reminded of a moment of Korean future classic Parasite (2019, dir. Bong Joon Ho), in which the poor driver asks the rich man if, despite her lack of cooking, cleaning, or maintaining the house, he loves his wife. The rich man hesitates for a second, then starts laughing. “Of course I do,” he says with a conviction that love has no materialistic gain. It only propels the poor character to scam the rich some more.
The best arcs of Kaiji are the ones where he has some control in the games and said control isn’t pulled out of thin air. Ostensibly, it’s because an active protagonist makes for better stories, a far more engaging watch than a protagonist simply pulled from one moment to the next. But as the show personifies capitalism, gives him a name and an unseemly appearance to match, Kaiji’s control gains a second and third dimension. Because to talk about capitalism is to talk about control: who gets to have control, who can exact control on you, who bought the game and rigged it. So then, Kaiji seizing the means means a pushback, a rebellion: in a system within a system, he can thrive and win -- and maybe get the people around him to win, also. When Kaiji is able to tell the opponent’s card, it is not by sheer deus-ex-machina, but by observation and planning in the game’s long term. When he can accurately call out a scam, it’s with the additional knowledge that Kaiji himself has a counter plan. “We don’t care about your rules,” Kaiji’s VA sings in the first opening. “We don’t care about your morals / We weren’t born to lose.” The rebellious attitude manifests best when Kaiji has something to rebel against, and if it’s in his means. Conversely, the most crushing moments of Kaiji are the moments where the chance of him destroying himself irreversibly seem greater than him winning, when his life is on the line and his irises have shrunk far into his wide eyes. In those moments, it’s impossible not to think of the pain of Kaiji’s temporary friends; as if he could hear the viewer’s thoughts, Kaiji frequently cries for the same reason. Absolute despair, chants the narrator.
In her excellent essay collection Trick Mirror: Reflections of Self-Delusion, Jia Tolentino observes that, now more than ever, surviving can look a lot like a lottery. “As wealth continues to flow upward,” she continues, “as Americans are increasingly shut out of their own democracy, as political action is constrained to online spectacle, I have felt so many times that the choice of this era is to be destroyed or to morally compromise ourselves in order to be functional -- to be wrecked, or to be functional for reasons that contribute to the wreck.” For one and a half episode, we see Kaiji’s moral compromise in order to function in society: he pushes aside the people that are friendly to him and presents himself as difficult on purpose. But in the gambles and against morally compromised people, his own moral compass shines through. He can only control when it’s a system within a system, a rigged game he can work against, be it by its design or the opponent’s cheats. In the workplace, he admits he can’t suck up to others and that he hates others that do; in the gambling ship, he berates others that they didn’t care about friendship, about the promises he’s wholeheartedly believed in. His sole sore spot, expertly pushed by Endou over and over until its breaking point, is when he points out to Kaiji that he can’t make choices on his own, and thus control his own life. Control, then, becomes both the bridge the characters crave and the abyss that they all fear. It manifests in the darkness and the hands that seizes hold of the characters. It’s Kaiji’s obsession of gambling, and its lack the empty feeling he senses in ordinary life, desperation and economic bankruptcy beckoning at every corner. Control, simply put, hides in the games of the show, the gambles that Kaiji takes, over and over: the fleeting moments where Kaiji doesn’t cry or feels despair, where he takes the scam head-on and has a retaliation, where he can take care of others and of himself. The outside games showcase compulsion -- the lack of control -- but even then, it’s hard to admonish Kaiji, who genuinely seems like a good person compromised by the world he’s in. In the second opening’s second half, Hyoudou’s wide and joyous face twists and turns to a roulette that Kaiji runs on like a ball to someone’s game, money bills blowing past him. He stretches out his hand to a bird of light; in the next shot, it flies high above the air and Kaiji chases on concrete. He falls, scraped and bruised, and gets up, eyes wide and then narrow as the viewer takes the bird’s place and flies off to the distance. “I can do it,” sings the vocalist of Fear, and Loathing in Las Vegas. “Stretch out your hand.”
There’s a message pinned to the #gambling-den channel in our Discord server, dated 23rd December. “there is a command called !gamble all alt that will gamble an extreme amount of your coins, and result in gains or losses of up to 25x”. I tried it out and promptly won, totalling my fictional currency to around 100k and, more importantly, got myself a spot in the top 20 currency holders of our server (a proud #13). I tried out the command again, but mixed up the prefix; this was while watching a Kaiji episode, and I felt in my gut that I would lose. I tried again and, as I had predicted, lost all of my currency. A fellow user, one that is very fond of me, sent 500 my way, and right away I felt the embarrassment I always do when receiving presents. “It’s not that serious,” I wrote; but in truth, I still glance at the channel, waiting for the moment when I feel ready to lose it all again. Or, maybe, possibly, gain some more. You know, just so that I can lose it all.
Credits: Title is a lyric from ABBA’s Money Money Money, off the 1976 album Arrival.
Translations to the first season are provided by the sub group Triad, the second by Nutbladder (if the file names don’t completely fail me). The translation to zawa has been found by urbandictionary. If there is a mistake in the translations provided, please let me know.
Parasite (2019) is a movie directed by Boon Jong-Ho, distributed in the US by Neon.
The excerpt off Jia Tolentino’s Trick Mirror: Reflections on Self-Delusion is in the essay A Story of a Generation in Seven Scams. The book is out via Random House and on all bookstores.
Translations to the second opening, Chase the Light, provided by Musicmatch.
Kaiji: Ultimate Survivor and Kaiji: Against All Odds has no licensors available for legal streaming (according to MAL).
Also thank you to DutchPeasant, Chariotwheel, and theangryeditor for their initial insights and comments.

List acquired here.
a aa aaa aaron ab abandoned abc aberdeen abilities ability able aboriginal abortion about above abraham abroad abs absence absent absolute absolutely absorption abstract abstracts abu abuse ac academic academics academy acc accent accept acceptable acceptance accepted accepting accepts access accessed accessibility accessible accessing accessories accessory accident accidents accommodate accommodation accommodations accompanied accompanying accomplish accomplished accordance according accordingly account accountability accounting accounts accreditation accredited accuracy accurate accurately accused acdbentity ace acer achieve achieved achievement achievements achieving acid acids acknowledge acknowledged acm acne acoustic acquire acquired acquisition acquisitions acre acres acrobat across acrylic act acting action actions activated activation active actively activists activities activity actor actors actress acts actual actually acute ad ada adam adams adaptation adapted adapter adapters adaptive adaptor add added addiction adding addition additional additionally additions address addressed addresses addressing adds adelaide adequate adidas adipex adjacent adjust adjustable adjusted adjustment adjustments admin administered administration administrative administrator administrators admission admissions admit admitted adobe adolescent adopt adopted adoption adrian ads adsl adult adults advance advanced advancement advances advantage advantages adventure adventures adverse advert advertise advertisement advertisements advertiser advertisers advertising advice advise advised advisor advisors advisory advocacy advocate adware ae aerial aerospace af affair affairs affect affected affecting affects affiliate affiliated affiliates affiliation afford affordable afghanistan afraid africa african after afternoon afterwards ag again against age aged agencies agency agenda agent agents ages aggregate aggressive aging ago agree agreed agreement agreements agrees 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approximately apps apr april apt aqua aquarium aquatic ar arab arabia arabic arbitrary arbitration arbor arc arcade arch architect architects architectural architecture archive archived archives arctic are area areas arena arg argentina argue argued argument arguments arise arising arizona arkansas arlington arm armed armenia armor arms armstrong army arnold around arrange arranged arrangement arrangements array arrest arrested arrival arrivals arrive arrived arrives arrow art arthritis arthur article articles artificial artist artistic artists arts artwork aruba as asbestos ascii ash ashley asia asian aside asin ask asked asking asks asn asp aspect aspects ass assault assembled assembly assess assessed assessing assessment assessments asset assets assign assigned assignment assignments assist assistance assistant assisted assists associate associated associates association associations assume assumed assumes assuming assumption assumptions assurance assure assured asthma astrology 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